What is your opinion, Your Eminence, regarding a man who marries a second wife with the intention of keeping up with others, or in order to discipline his wife as he claims, and this marriage usually fails?
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The questioner : Buraydah, Your Eminence.
The Shaykh : Please go ahead.
The questioner : Peace be upon you, and Allah's mercy and blessings.
The Shaykh : Peace and the mercy and blessings of Allah be upon you.
The questioner : Since the discussion is about wedding occasions, this brother is asking: What is your opinion, Your Eminence, regarding a man who marries a second wife with the intention of keeping up with others, or in order to discipline his wife as he claims? And this marriage usually fails?
The Shaykh : As for plural marriage, is it better to have multiple wives or is it better to have just one? There are two well-known opinions among the scholars regarding this. The first opinion is that it is better to limit oneself to one wife. This is the well-known view in the school of Imam Ahmad (may Allah have mercy on him) among his later followers. They said: It is a recommended practice (sunnah) to marry only one woman. They reasoned this by saying that it is further from injustice, it gathers the heart, and it is further from confusion. Others said: Rather, it is better to have multiple wives, because it is more conducive to achieving the benefits of marriage. The opinion favoring plural marriage is closer to the truth than the opinion favoring having only one wife. However, a man who marries with the intention of keeping up with others and their practices has a bad, blameworthy intention. Women are not clothes that men wear. If others wear a new garment, he wears a new garment. Rather, a woman is an honored woman who has her rights. And a man who marries in order to discipline his wife has done nothing wrong, because some women are not disciplined except by women. For this reason, it is said: Women are disciplined by women. Many women are defiant and do not fulfill the obligatory rights of their husband. So he wants to relax and marry another woman over her. If he marries another woman over her, some of them will become obedient, and some will become more defiant. In that case, he divorces her and leaves her with her family. So the important point is that marrying in order to discipline a defiant wife is permissible. But marrying in order to keep up with people is not permissible. Yes.
The Shaykh : Please go ahead.
The questioner : Peace be upon you, and Allah's mercy and blessings.
The Shaykh : Peace and the mercy and blessings of Allah be upon you.
The questioner : Since the discussion is about wedding occasions, this brother is asking: What is your opinion, Your Eminence, regarding a man who marries a second wife with the intention of keeping up with others, or in order to discipline his wife as he claims? And this marriage usually fails?
The Shaykh : As for plural marriage, is it better to have multiple wives or is it better to have just one? There are two well-known opinions among the scholars regarding this. The first opinion is that it is better to limit oneself to one wife. This is the well-known view in the school of Imam Ahmad (may Allah have mercy on him) among his later followers. They said: It is a recommended practice (sunnah) to marry only one woman. They reasoned this by saying that it is further from injustice, it gathers the heart, and it is further from confusion. Others said: Rather, it is better to have multiple wives, because it is more conducive to achieving the benefits of marriage. The opinion favoring plural marriage is closer to the truth than the opinion favoring having only one wife. However, a man who marries with the intention of keeping up with others and their practices has a bad, blameworthy intention. Women are not clothes that men wear. If others wear a new garment, he wears a new garment. Rather, a woman is an honored woman who has her rights. And a man who marries in order to discipline his wife has done nothing wrong, because some women are not disciplined except by women. For this reason, it is said: Women are disciplined by women. Many women are defiant and do not fulfill the obligatory rights of their husband. So he wants to relax and marry another woman over her. If he marries another woman over her, some of them will become obedient, and some will become more defiant. In that case, he divorces her and leaves her with her family. So the important point is that marrying in order to discipline a defiant wife is permissible. But marrying in order to keep up with people is not permissible. Yes.