What is the ruling on hitting children before they reach the age of seven?
Machine translationRead the Arabic original
The questioner : Regarding the topic of hitting children; I think you once mentioned that it is not permissible to hit them, considering that the Wise Lawgiver has clarified for us that we should hit them for the sake of prayer. Now, in reality, we do hit them, but it is not a severe beating; rather, it is a disciplinary hit, perhaps on the back of the head or the hand, to correct a mistake, a word, or a movement.
The Shaykh: Yes.
The questioner : Is there any blame in this?
The Shaykh : Is the hit specifically for prayer, or does it go beyond what you mentioned, which is a disciplinary hit?
The questioner : No, it does not go beyond that, of course.
The Shaykh : So, what is the difference?
The questioner: Yes.
The Shaykh : And who is the one who should hit?
The questioner : Yes, of course, prayer is a religious matter. Now, Shaykh, truly, among the social matters that we have known, meaning from our fathers... they are not hit.
The Shaykh : If you put it more precisely: we lived it.
The questioner: Yes.
The Shaykh : We did not just know it.
The questioner: Yes.
The Shaykh : Because one may have lived it with awareness, or without awareness.
The questioner: Yes.
The Shaykh : ... .
The questioner : We lived it, yes, Shaykh; regarding the topic of hitting, meaning.
The Shaykh : It is necessary.
The questioner : Yes, it is necessary.
The Shaykh: Yes.
The questioner: Yes.
The Shaykh : I am asking you.
The questioner: Go ahead.
The Shaykh : Is "necessary" the expression... did you know it in your expression, and in my correction, did you live it in an Islamic society?
The questioner : No, of course...
The Shaykh : So, what is its value?
The questioner : Yes, here is the connection.
The Shaykh: [ The Shaykh laughs! ] .
The questioner : This is the connection. Now, what do we do now, given the state of the Islamic society...
The Shaykh : Do as you please; you should raise yourselves before you raise your children!
The questioner : Yes, oh Allah.
The Shaykh : Allah is the Helper.
Another questioner : But truly, most of the problems with children stem from bad upbringing, a bad environment.
The questioner : The point is that we...
The Shaykh : The problem is that people today do not know justice.
The questioner: Yes.
The Shaykh : Either the boy lives and reaches manhood without ever being touched by a hand in his time, or you find the father or the mother hitting the boy when he is two years old, and the hit is not just as you said; it is a severe beating.
The questioner: Yes.
The Shaykh : And the hit is not intended for upbringing, but to vent anger.
The questioner : Yes, that is right.
The Shaykh : What is this life?!
The questioner : Yes, correct. The point, my Shaykh, is that regarding us, a person in his home, meaning, to a certain extent, he can be like a small Islamic state in his home, but this exceeds... to his father's house, to his wife's father's house, the children are not raised, they are street kids, they live together, the child cannot be held all the time with me; so this is also one of the great calamities we are falling into; meaning, in my home, I can hold my child to a certain extent.
We ask Allah to bestow His favor upon us.
Another questioner : They do not hit them, and the father wants to hit him, on the contrary.
The questioner: Yes.
The Shaykh: Yes.
The questioner : Is there any blame in this?
The Shaykh : Is the hit specifically for prayer, or does it go beyond what you mentioned, which is a disciplinary hit?
The questioner : No, it does not go beyond that, of course.
The Shaykh : So, what is the difference?
The questioner: Yes.
The Shaykh : And who is the one who should hit?
The questioner : Yes, of course, prayer is a religious matter. Now, Shaykh, truly, among the social matters that we have known, meaning from our fathers... they are not hit.
The Shaykh : If you put it more precisely: we lived it.
The questioner: Yes.
The Shaykh : We did not just know it.
The questioner: Yes.
The Shaykh : Because one may have lived it with awareness, or without awareness.
The questioner: Yes.
The Shaykh : ... .
The questioner : We lived it, yes, Shaykh; regarding the topic of hitting, meaning.
The Shaykh : It is necessary.
The questioner : Yes, it is necessary.
The Shaykh: Yes.
The questioner: Yes.
The Shaykh : I am asking you.
The questioner: Go ahead.
The Shaykh : Is "necessary" the expression... did you know it in your expression, and in my correction, did you live it in an Islamic society?
The questioner : No, of course...
The Shaykh : So, what is its value?
The questioner : Yes, here is the connection.
The Shaykh: [ The Shaykh laughs! ] .
The questioner : This is the connection. Now, what do we do now, given the state of the Islamic society...
The Shaykh : Do as you please; you should raise yourselves before you raise your children!
The questioner : Yes, oh Allah.
The Shaykh : Allah is the Helper.
Another questioner : But truly, most of the problems with children stem from bad upbringing, a bad environment.
The questioner : The point is that we...
The Shaykh : The problem is that people today do not know justice.
The questioner: Yes.
The Shaykh : Either the boy lives and reaches manhood without ever being touched by a hand in his time, or you find the father or the mother hitting the boy when he is two years old, and the hit is not just as you said; it is a severe beating.
The questioner: Yes.
The Shaykh : And the hit is not intended for upbringing, but to vent anger.
The questioner : Yes, that is right.
The Shaykh : What is this life?!
The questioner : Yes, correct. The point, my Shaykh, is that regarding us, a person in his home, meaning, to a certain extent, he can be like a small Islamic state in his home, but this exceeds... to his father's house, to his wife's father's house, the children are not raised, they are street kids, they live together, the child cannot be held all the time with me; so this is also one of the great calamities we are falling into; meaning, in my home, I can hold my child to a certain extent.
We ask Allah to bestow His favor upon us.
Another questioner : They do not hit them, and the father wants to hit him, on the contrary.
The questioner: Yes.
Source
www.al-albany.com
The Arabic text is copied verbatim from the original source, without any edits.