Is it permissible for a woman to shake hands with a man who has returned from a long journey, given that he is a relative of hers, such as her cousin or her maternal cousin?
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The questioner : Is it permissible for a woman to shake hands with a man who has returned from a long journey, and who is a relative of hers, such as a paternal or maternal cousin?
The Shaykh : Yes. It is forbidden (haram) for a woman to shake hands with a man who is not one of her mahram (close relatives), and it is not permissible for any occasion, whether it is because he has returned from an absence, on the occasion of a festival, or on any other occasion. It is not permissible for a man to shake hands with a woman who is a stranger to him, as indicated by the hadiths of the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him), and because of the great fitnah (trial, discord or temptation) in a man shaking hands with a woman who is not among his mahram. Some people have been lax in this matter, and you find them shaking hands with a woman who is a stranger to them because she is their cousin or their maternal cousin or the like. This is forbidden for them, and it is not permissible for them to engage in this act. They may say, "This is one of our customs."
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : And we have become accustomed to this and see no harm in it. We say that the criterion for every Muslim is the Shari'ah (Islamic sacred law), whether the custom agrees with it or contradicts it, by the saying of Allah the Exalted:[Al-Ahzab 33:36] So there is no choice for the believing person in the religion of Allah, ever. Rather, it is obligatory for him to submit and surrender, as Allah the Exalted said: [An-Nisa 4:65] So reflect on this noble verse, where Allah the Exalted swore a firm oath by His lordship over the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) that they do not believe—meaning those to whom he was sent, from his time until the Day of Resurrection—until they refer to you in whatever matter has arisen between them, and make you the judge in the disputes and differences that occurred among them. Then, after that, they find no difficulty in their souls regarding what you have judged, so their hearts do not narrow over the judgment you have rendered. Then they submit in full submission, meaning they obey completely, without hesitation or slackness.
So every Muslim must avoid what Allah and His Messenger have forbidden, even if they have become accustomed to doing it, because custom does not rule over the Shari'ah; rather, the Shari'ah is what rules over custom. Yes.
The questioner : May Allah bless you. The listener, in his second question, says:
The Shaykh : Yes. It is forbidden (haram) for a woman to shake hands with a man who is not one of her mahram (close relatives), and it is not permissible for any occasion, whether it is because he has returned from an absence, on the occasion of a festival, or on any other occasion. It is not permissible for a man to shake hands with a woman who is a stranger to him, as indicated by the hadiths of the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him), and because of the great fitnah (trial, discord or temptation) in a man shaking hands with a woman who is not among his mahram. Some people have been lax in this matter, and you find them shaking hands with a woman who is a stranger to them because she is their cousin or their maternal cousin or the like. This is forbidden for them, and it is not permissible for them to engage in this act. They may say, "This is one of our customs."
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : And we have become accustomed to this and see no harm in it. We say that the criterion for every Muslim is the Shari'ah (Islamic sacred law), whether the custom agrees with it or contradicts it, by the saying of Allah the Exalted:
It is not for a believing man or a believing woman, when Allah and His Messenger have decided a matter, that they should [thereafter] have any choice about their affair. And whoever disobeys Allah and His Messenger has certainly strayed into clear error.
وَمَا كَانَ لِمُؤْمِنٍ وَلا مُؤْمِنَةٍ إِذَا قَضَى اللَّهُ وَرَسُولُهُ أَمْرًا أَنْ يَكُونَ لَهُمُ الْخِيَرَةُ مِنْ أَمْرِهِمْ وَمَنْ يَعْصِ اللَّهَ وَرَسُولَهُ فَقَدْ ضَلَّ ضَلالًا مُبِينًاBut no, by your Lord, they will not [truly] believe until they make you, [O Muhammad], judge concerning that over which they dispute among themselves and then find within themselves no discomfort from what you have judged and submit in [full, willing] submission.
فَلا وَرَبِّكَ لا يُؤْمِنُونَ حَتَّى يُحَكِّمُوكَ فِيمَا شَجَرَ بَيْنَهُمْ ثُمَّ لا يَجِدُوا فِي أَنفُسِهِمْ حَرَجًا مِمَّا قَضَيْتَ وَيُسَلِّمُوا تَسْلِيمًاSo every Muslim must avoid what Allah and His Messenger have forbidden, even if they have become accustomed to doing it, because custom does not rule over the Shari'ah; rather, the Shari'ah is what rules over custom. Yes.
The questioner : May Allah bless you. The listener, in his second question, says: