The Difference Between a Man Declaring His Wife Forbidden and Zihar, and the Expiation for Zihar
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The Shaykh : We have just mentioned that if a man says to his wife, “You are forbidden to me,” or “My wife is forbidden to me,” what is his obligation?
The student: The expiation for an oath.
The Shaykh : The expiation for an oath. But if he says to his wife, “You are to me like my mother,” then this is zihar. Allah the Exalted described it as an abominable statement and a lie. So what is obligatory for him if he says to his wife, “You are to me like my mother,” or “like my mother’s back,” or something similar? We say: He must abstain from her. She is not to be divorced; she is not to be divorced. But he must abstain from her until he frees a slave. If he cannot find one, let him fast for two consecutive months. If he cannot do that, let him feed sixty poor people. And he must not approach her until he does what Allah has commanded him to do.
The student: The expiation for an oath.
The Shaykh : The expiation for an oath. But if he says to his wife, “You are to me like my mother,” then this is zihar. Allah the Exalted described it as an abominable statement and a lie. So what is obligatory for him if he says to his wife, “You are to me like my mother,” or “like my mother’s back,” or something similar? We say: He must abstain from her. She is not to be divorced; she is not to be divorced. But he must abstain from her until he frees a slave. If he cannot find one, let him fast for two consecutive months. If he cannot do that, let him feed sixty poor people. And he must not approach her until he does what Allah has commanded him to do.