Does the guardianship transfer from the father to the son if the father did not strive to choose a righteous husband for his daughter, such that when a suitor comes, he does not care?
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The questioner : Noble Shaykh, does the guardianship transfer from the father to the son if the father did not strive to choose a righteous husband for his daughter, such that when a suitor comes, he does not care about it, nor does he ask about him, or he distorts his daughter's image in the suitor's eyes to deter him from marriage? Please inform us about this. May Allah reward you with good.
The Shaykh : I say that the wali (guardian) of a woman, whether he is her father, brother, or uncle, is responsible for his guardianship before Allah (Mighty and Majestic). It is obligatory for him to fulfill the trust. If a person of good character and religion proposes to his ward and the woman is pleased with that, then he must marry her to him. It is not permissible for him to delay, because that is contrary to the trust; rather, it is a betrayal. Allah (Mighty and Majestic) said:[Al-Anfal 8:27-28] Therefore, it is obligatory for the one whom Allah has made a guardian over a woman, if a suitable suitor in religion and character proposes to her, to marry her if she is pleased. And let him know that the woman feels what he feels regarding desire. I do not know if someone prevented a young man with desire from marrying, would he consider himself unjust to him or not? I believe he would say: "He is unjust to me." If he says that regarding the one who prevented him from marrying, how does he treat this poor woman who cannot marry herself, and no one from her relatives can proceed to marry her, while the closest wali is present?
Many young women remained unmarried and reached a great age without getting married because of these unjust guardians, may Allah protect us from that.
I have been told about a young woman whose father prevented her, meaning he prevented the suitors from marrying her. She was affected by this and the woman became ill. While she was on her deathbed, nearing her end, she said to the women around her: "Convey my greetings to my father and tell him that there is a matter between me and him before Allah on the Day of Resurrection." Meaning, she will demand from him on the Day of Resurrection for what he did by preventing the men. Perhaps her illness and death were due to the oppression.
Therefore, we say: If a guardian prevents his ward from marrying a suitable suitor whom she has accepted, the woman has the right to demand this from the judge. The judge must respond to her request to marry her to this suitable suitor whom she has accepted. Either he appoints the person closest to her after the guardian who refused, or he does what he sees as in accordance with the Shari'ah.
However, the woman may not be able to do that out of modesty or fear of violating customs or the like. In that case, nothing remains but the severe punishment of the Lord of the Worlds (Mighty and Majestic). Let this wali fear Allah and be mindful of his Lord. And I say, as the scholars (may Allah have mercy on them) said: If a guardian repeatedly rejects suitors, he becomes an open sinner, and his integrity is removed. He does not undertake any work in which integrity is required, and the guardianship transfers from him to the next guardian after him. Yes.
The questioner : May Allah reward you.
The Shaykh : I say that the wali (guardian) of a woman, whether he is her father, brother, or uncle, is responsible for his guardianship before Allah (Mighty and Majestic). It is obligatory for him to fulfill the trust. If a person of good character and religion proposes to his ward and the woman is pleased with that, then he must marry her to him. It is not permissible for him to delay, because that is contrary to the trust; rather, it is a betrayal. Allah (Mighty and Majestic) said:
(27) O you who have believed, do not betray Allah and the Messenger or betray your trusts while you know [the consequence]. (28) And know that your properties and your children are but a trial and that Allah has with Him a great reward.
يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ ءامَنُوا لا تَخُونُوا اللَّهَ وَالرَّسُولَ وَتَخُونُوا أَمَانَاتِكُمْ وَأَنْتُمْ تَعْلَمُونَ * وَاعْلَمُوا أَنَّمَا أَمْوَالُكُمْ وَأَوْلادُكُمْ فِتْنَةٌ وَأَنَّ اللَّهَ عِنْدَهُ أَجْرٌ عَظِيمٌMany young women remained unmarried and reached a great age without getting married because of these unjust guardians, may Allah protect us from that.
I have been told about a young woman whose father prevented her, meaning he prevented the suitors from marrying her. She was affected by this and the woman became ill. While she was on her deathbed, nearing her end, she said to the women around her: "Convey my greetings to my father and tell him that there is a matter between me and him before Allah on the Day of Resurrection." Meaning, she will demand from him on the Day of Resurrection for what he did by preventing the men. Perhaps her illness and death were due to the oppression.
Therefore, we say: If a guardian prevents his ward from marrying a suitable suitor whom she has accepted, the woman has the right to demand this from the judge. The judge must respond to her request to marry her to this suitable suitor whom she has accepted. Either he appoints the person closest to her after the guardian who refused, or he does what he sees as in accordance with the Shari'ah.
However, the woman may not be able to do that out of modesty or fear of violating customs or the like. In that case, nothing remains but the severe punishment of the Lord of the Worlds (Mighty and Majestic). Let this wali fear Allah and be mindful of his Lord. And I say, as the scholars (may Allah have mercy on them) said: If a guardian repeatedly rejects suitors, he becomes an open sinner, and his integrity is removed. He does not undertake any work in which integrity is required, and the guardianship transfers from him to the next guardian after him. Yes.
The questioner : May Allah reward you.