The questioner mentions an issue or a social situation that is widespread among them. In fact, the handwriting is small and the paper is large, but the summary is that they have an agreement regarding
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The questioner : Shaykh Muhammad.
The Shaykh : Welcome... Welcome to you.
The questioner : This is a message we received from the questioner, H.S.M. from the Al-Khalid clan of Bani Malik in the south. The questioner mentions an issue or a social situation that is widespread among them. In fact, the handwriting is small and there is a lot of it, and the paper is large, but the summary is that they have an agreement on the mahr in marriage. There are some greedy people, or those who want to covet what belongs to others, who resort to tricks to take more than what was agreed upon. He asks: What is the ruling on the money that is taken without disclosure, meaning without it being known that it was taken? Is it haram or halal?
The Shaykh : Praise be to Allah, Lord of the worlds, and may peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Muhammad, and upon his family and all his Companions. As for what follows, the answer to this question is that we say that the Sunnah regarding the mahr is that it should be small and should be according to the husband's circumstances. This is based on the hadith reported from the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) that he said:Mishkat al-Masabih 3097 And in the story of the woman who offered herself to the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him), but he had no need for her, so one of the Companions (may Allah be pleased with them) asked for her. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) asked him for her mahr, until he said to him, "Seek it, even if it is just an iron ring." But he could not find one, so he said, "I have married you to her with what you have of the Qur'an." This is evidence that it is recommended for a person to have the mahr according to his circumstances.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : And that he should not burden himself with what he cannot bear. This also applies, either by analogy or by the generality of the meaning, to[At-Talaq 65:7].
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : Burdening people with these exorbitant mahrs is contrary to the Shari'ah and involves harms, which is not the place to mention them, and much has been written about them in books and newspapers. The agreement of a tribe, a group of people, or the people of a town to set a limit for the mahr is a good and fine matter, provided that this limit is in accordance with the Shari'ah.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : However, that is not obligatory; rather, it is one of the matters that honor and dignity require, namely that a person does not deviate from what his tribe, his group, or the people of his town are accustomed to, especially if that is by mutual agreement with him.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : Fulfilling such a matter is one of the praiseworthy and good things. However, if it is assumed that it was not possible for him to marry with this agreed-upon amount, and he publicly stated that he married with it, while in reality he gave the wife something secretly, we do not see any harm in that.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : Yes.
The questioner : But before we address his other question, there are those who cite or argue with the hadith of the woman with 'Umar ibn al-Khattab (may Allah be pleased with him).
The Shaykh : Yes.
The questioner : And when he spoke about the mahrs, she rebuked him, or something of that sort, so he said, "The woman was right and 'Umar was wrong."
The Shaykh : Some scholars have spoken about this hadith.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : Regarding its authenticity from 'Umar, they have criticized it. And even if it is established, the prohibition is not because they agreed upon it, but because they forced it upon them. There is a difference between a matter that everyone agrees upon and a matter that is imposed upon them.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : Forcing people to pay a specific mahr may be a matter that requires scrutiny and must be carefully examined and verified from the Shari'ah perspective. But if people agree on setting a limit, this is a matter that occurred by their choice, and no one forced it upon them. Adhering to it, as I said, is one of the matters of honor and dignity, and of not contradicting the tribe, the people of the town, and the group.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : Yes.
The Shaykh : Welcome... Welcome to you.
The questioner : This is a message we received from the questioner, H.S.M. from the Al-Khalid clan of Bani Malik in the south. The questioner mentions an issue or a social situation that is widespread among them. In fact, the handwriting is small and there is a lot of it, and the paper is large, but the summary is that they have an agreement on the mahr in marriage. There are some greedy people, or those who want to covet what belongs to others, who resort to tricks to take more than what was agreed upon. He asks: What is the ruling on the money that is taken without disclosure, meaning without it being known that it was taken? Is it haram or halal?
The Shaykh : Praise be to Allah, Lord of the worlds, and may peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Muhammad, and upon his family and all his Companions. As for what follows, the answer to this question is that we say that the Sunnah regarding the mahr is that it should be small and should be according to the husband's circumstances. This is based on the hadith reported from the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) that he said:
The marriage which produces most blessing is that which involves least burden
أعظم النكاح بركة أيسره مؤونةThe questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : And that he should not burden himself with what he cannot bear. This also applies, either by analogy or by the generality of the meaning, to
Let a man of wealth spend from his wealth, and he whose provision is restricted - let him spend from what Allah has given him
لينفق ذو سعة من سعته ومن قدر عليه رزقه فلينفق مما ءاتاه اللهThe questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : Burdening people with these exorbitant mahrs is contrary to the Shari'ah and involves harms, which is not the place to mention them, and much has been written about them in books and newspapers. The agreement of a tribe, a group of people, or the people of a town to set a limit for the mahr is a good and fine matter, provided that this limit is in accordance with the Shari'ah.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : However, that is not obligatory; rather, it is one of the matters that honor and dignity require, namely that a person does not deviate from what his tribe, his group, or the people of his town are accustomed to, especially if that is by mutual agreement with him.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : Fulfilling such a matter is one of the praiseworthy and good things. However, if it is assumed that it was not possible for him to marry with this agreed-upon amount, and he publicly stated that he married with it, while in reality he gave the wife something secretly, we do not see any harm in that.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : Yes.
The questioner : But before we address his other question, there are those who cite or argue with the hadith of the woman with 'Umar ibn al-Khattab (may Allah be pleased with him).
The Shaykh : Yes.
The questioner : And when he spoke about the mahrs, she rebuked him, or something of that sort, so he said, "The woman was right and 'Umar was wrong."
The Shaykh : Some scholars have spoken about this hadith.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : Regarding its authenticity from 'Umar, they have criticized it. And even if it is established, the prohibition is not because they agreed upon it, but because they forced it upon them. There is a difference between a matter that everyone agrees upon and a matter that is imposed upon them.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : Forcing people to pay a specific mahr may be a matter that requires scrutiny and must be carefully examined and verified from the Shari'ah perspective. But if people agree on setting a limit, this is a matter that occurred by their choice, and no one forced it upon them. Adhering to it, as I said, is one of the matters of honor and dignity, and of not contradicting the tribe, the people of the town, and the group.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : Yes.