Discussion regarding the ruling on looking at a prospective bride.
Machine translationRead the Arabic original
The Shaykh : We have previously stated that the suitor is permitted to look at what is usually visible of his prospective bride, meaning what is generally visible. We clarified that the author of the text says "to him". Did he intend to permit it in contrast to prohibition, such that it does not conflict with it being a recommended practice? Or did he intend to permit it to establish its ruling?
The questioner : The first.
The Shaykh : We mentioned that there are two possibilities and two opinions in this issue. Some scholars said it is recommended for the suitor to look, while others said it is permissible. The evidence or proof for those who said it is permissible is that a command following a prohibition is for permission. The proof for those who said it is a recommended practice is that the original ruling of a command is seeking, meaning that what is commanded is sought. This is one point. The second is that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) explained this ruling with what indicates seeking, sayingJami` at-Tirmidhi 1087Sahih (Darussalam) meaning that it will bring harmony between you. This is like his saying regarding visiting graves Sahih Muslim 976b after he had prohibited visiting graves. Do we say that visiting graves is permissible because the command came after the prohibition, or do we say it is a recommended practice because this command was explained with what implies recommendation? Do we say the second or the first?
The questioner : The second one.
The Shaykh : The second. And based on this, the correct opinion in this issue, which is the suitor looking at the prospective bride, is that it is a recommended practice.
The questioner : The first.
The Shaykh : We mentioned that there are two possibilities and two opinions in this issue. Some scholars said it is recommended for the suitor to look, while others said it is permissible. The evidence or proof for those who said it is permissible is that a command following a prohibition is for permission. The proof for those who said it is a recommended practice is that the original ruling of a command is seeking, meaning that what is commanded is sought. This is one point. The second is that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) explained this ruling with what indicates seeking, saying
for indeed that is more likely to make things better between the two of you
إنه أحرى أن يؤدم بينكماso visit the graves, for that makes you mindful of death.
زوروا القبور فإنها تُذكِّر الموتThe questioner : The second one.
The Shaykh : The second. And based on this, the correct opinion in this issue, which is the suitor looking at the prospective bride, is that it is a recommended practice.