Discussion with Questions
Machine translationRead the Arabic original
The questioner : Regarding the stepdaughter, O Shaykh, is her guardian her stepfather, meaning the husband of her mother, or is it her uncles?
The Shaykh : Her stepfather? What is the relationship of her stepfather to her?
The questioner : Her relationship to him is that she is a stepdaughter, meaning she is in their care.
The Shaykh : Okay, is he a relative?
The questioner : He is not a relative.
The Shaykh : Okay, guardianship is not obtained except through kinship or the bond of manumission. In any case, he has no role in guardianship.
The questioner : Shaykh, some of the men who marry abroad find that the state requires, as a necessity, approval, and sometimes... approval is not granted, and he goes and marries abroad.
The Shaykh : I did not understand. Marrying abroad requires the state's approval.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : Yes.
The questioner : Some of them marry abroad without approval.
The Shaykh : Huh? But without approval, or without the state's knowledge?
The questioner : No, he applied for approval, the state rejected it, and he went and married.
The Shaykh : Yes, what do you say about this marriage?
The questioner : According to the correct view...
The Shaykh : Yes? According to the correct view, it is valid, or invalid if you wish.
The questioner : The correct view, O Shaykh... how...
The Shaykh : Yes, the correct view is that it is valid...
The questioner : Does he commit a sin?
The Shaykh : Yes, he commits a sin.
The questioner : And what are the consequences?
The Shaykh : The consequence is that the state imposes a discretionary punishment on him, punishing him as it sees fit, because Allah said[An-Nisa 4:59] and the state has a stake in this, because many problems arise from marrying abroad. You know that often temperaments do not match and customs differ, and then if Allah decrees children between them, it becomes a problem. Then if the husband dies, this wife will have a share of the inheritance, and she may choose to return to her country, and we will have difficulty dividing the inheritance. There are many problems, so the state has a stake in this prohibition. But on the other hand, the state must also look at the problems of marriage among us. Some of the marriage problems now reach forty thousand for the mahr. Yes, and Allah, they told me it reached... thousand.
The questioner : Thirty thousand, O Shaykh.
The Shaykh : How?
The questioner : Thirty thousand. A thousand is simple; I wish it were forty.
Another questioner: Forty... this is cheap.
The Shaykh : May Allah guide us and you. Forty is cheap, and the Messenger of Allah said.
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : Strange! ... with such a small amount? There is no power nor strength except with Allah. Okay, I say these problems require state intervention. It is not correct. If a person comes and says, "I want this girl for this man, and he is suitable in his religion and character, and I have ten thousand," ten thousand can buy a simple room, a bedroom, a bed, a wardrobe for clothes, and a sponge mat for the room, or not? Can it buy gold befitting her status? Okay, they say no. Here the government intervenes and transfers the guardianship from the father to the other relatives. If they refuse, as is the case, and they are stubborn and say, "We cannot marry her off..." we say... come, O judge, marry her off.
The questioner : Is it permissible?
The Shaykh : It is permissible. How is it permissible? It is obligatory. It is obligatory to address the issue in this manner, as long as the girl is willing and he is suitable. And now, women are complaining about their fathers. They call us on the phone and complain about their fathers, saying they reject suitable husbands, either on the pretext that the man's religion is lax and he is not committed, or on the pretext that she is studying and they want her salary. Okay, brother, we must intervene, and it is obligatory. In truth, the government is negligent in this. It is negligent, and exaggerating the mahr is contrary to the Shari'ah. The story of 'Umar, if it is authentic, is in specific cases. And Allah the Mighty and Majestic says by way of exaggeration, otherwise no one would give a mahr, especially at that time. Do you know how much a qintar is? A thousand dinars of gold. This is the minimum mentioned regarding it, and no one was giving it in the time of the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him). But this is by way of exaggeration, meaning if it reached the point where you gave one of them a qintar, do not take anything from it [An-Nisa 4:20-21]. In truth, it is obligatory to look into this issue. Now, young men are going abroad to marry behind the state's back. Then some of them are now going to commit zina only, because a fatwa appeared that it is permissible to marry with the intention of divorce. But for whom is it permissible to marry with the intention of divorce? For the stranger in dire need who stays there for work other than intercourse. Now, they go to vacation in a place, and one man takes four wives a day. He has no wife with him, four wives, because it is cheap there. He can get one for five hundred riyals or a thousand riyals. In truth, this is a problem, meaning it still occupies my mind.
The questioner : Shaykh, now the problem of mahr is the main reason that makes them marry abroad.
The Shaykh : There is no doubt.
The questioner : Do they commit a sin for this?
The Shaykh : Who commits a sin?
The questioner : Meaning... does this one commit a sin?
The Shaykh : Yes, he commits a sin. Just as if the state took his wealth, let him be patient. This prevented his right, so let him be patient and seek reward, because we found problems. And now, the people abroad have started to look at Saudi youth with a bad eye. One man comes, marries for a week or two, and leaves, leaving her either to divorce her and let her go, which is the lesser of the two, or to leave her and... saying, "Perhaps I will come to the country a second time." Problems, meaning people have become like bulls and he-asses.
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : For four hundred dirhams, it was said, "It is as if you are carving silver from this mountain." Yes, he has the right to be angry. The mahr of the best of women is from four hundred to five hundred dirhams. The wives of the Messenger of Allah and his daughters did not exceed five hundred dirhams.
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : Huh?
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : Simple. Two hundred dirhams is fifty-six riyals. Two hundred dirhams is fifty-six riyals. How much is that?
The questioner : One hundred and twelve.
The Shaykh : One hundred and twelve. Add twenty-eight to it?
The questioner : One hundred and forty.
The Shaykh : Huh?
The questioner : One hundred and forty.
The Shaykh : One hundred and forty. This is easy. One hundred and forty. But you have made us feel bad. You said forty is cited as an example of smallness. May Allah guide him, Khalid. May Allah guide you. I do not know about him.
The questioner : Correct.
The Shaykh : In any case, I say these are issues, meaning a problem. The youth are between two things: either they travel, and I say this is rare, the establishment of the noon prayer, because the whole matter is anomalous. So this problem is our very difficult problem. It is feared that the youth will slip, because no matter how much the young man is patient, he cannot hold back. This is something Allah placed in the sons of Adam. And I tell you, it is not specific to men; even women cannot hold back now. And some women, with the expansion of the horizon now in information, and the fact that the woman reads, and that she hears, and that she is watched, have lost the modesty that was there before. It has gone from them. Now she is like the man. She calls a person and says, "Find me a halal son." Okay, did these women do this before? No. If it were said to her that a man proposed to her, she would cry night and day. So the result is that the matter has become a major problem in our society. And we ask Allah to guide the government to solve it, because it is a problem, a problem of the utmost degree. So we hope Allah will make it easy. Yes, okay.
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : Those whose consent or permission is not required are four categories. The first is Allah's slaves?
The questioner : The insane and...
The Shaykh : The insane, and the second?
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : And the third? And the fourth?
The questioner : The virgin.
The Shaykh : The virgin.
The questioner : Even if she is of age.
The Shaykh : Even if she is of age. Perfect. Who takes charge of marrying them without their permission? Hamad?
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : Marrying these four without their permission?
The questioner : This ... .
The Shaykh : Who...?
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : And the son?
The questioner : Yes?
The Shaykh : The son?
The questioner : No.
The Shaykh : Huh? Who?
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : The testator?
The questioner : The one in charge of affairs... after the death of...
The Shaykh : You did not review, O Ahmad. You did not review.
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : Leave it. You did not review.
The questioner : The father.
The Shaykh : And whom?
The questioner : ... the Sunnah...
The Shaykh : Be patient. The father, then?
The questioner : The entrusted one.
The Shaykh : The agent, meaning?
The questioner : The agent.
The Shaykh : Yes, wrong.
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : Wrong. The father and his agent in marriage. Okay. Does the grandfather marry these?
The questioner : He does not marry them.
The Shaykh : Very well.
The Shaykh : Her stepfather? What is the relationship of her stepfather to her?
The questioner : Her relationship to him is that she is a stepdaughter, meaning she is in their care.
The Shaykh : Okay, is he a relative?
The questioner : He is not a relative.
The Shaykh : Okay, guardianship is not obtained except through kinship or the bond of manumission. In any case, he has no role in guardianship.
The questioner : Shaykh, some of the men who marry abroad find that the state requires, as a necessity, approval, and sometimes... approval is not granted, and he goes and marries abroad.
The Shaykh : I did not understand. Marrying abroad requires the state's approval.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : Yes.
The questioner : Some of them marry abroad without approval.
The Shaykh : Huh? But without approval, or without the state's knowledge?
The questioner : No, he applied for approval, the state rejected it, and he went and married.
The Shaykh : Yes, what do you say about this marriage?
The questioner : According to the correct view...
The Shaykh : Yes? According to the correct view, it is valid, or invalid if you wish.
The questioner : The correct view, O Shaykh... how...
The Shaykh : Yes, the correct view is that it is valid...
The questioner : Does he commit a sin?
The Shaykh : Yes, he commits a sin.
The questioner : And what are the consequences?
The Shaykh : The consequence is that the state imposes a discretionary punishment on him, punishing him as it sees fit, because Allah said
obey Allah and obey the Messenger and those in authority among you
أطيعوا الله وأطيعوا الرسول وأولي الأمر منكمThe questioner : Thirty thousand, O Shaykh.
The Shaykh : How?
The questioner : Thirty thousand. A thousand is simple; I wish it were forty.
Another questioner: Forty... this is cheap.
The Shaykh : May Allah guide us and you. Forty is cheap, and the Messenger of Allah said
Even if it is a ring of iron
ولو خاتم من حديدThe questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : Strange! ... with such a small amount? There is no power nor strength except with Allah. Okay, I say these problems require state intervention. It is not correct. If a person comes and says, "I want this girl for this man, and he is suitable in his religion and character, and I have ten thousand," ten thousand can buy a simple room, a bedroom, a bed, a wardrobe for clothes, and a sponge mat for the room, or not? Can it buy gold befitting her status? Okay, they say no. Here the government intervenes and transfers the guardianship from the father to the other relatives. If they refuse, as is the case, and they are stubborn and say, "We cannot marry her off..." we say... come, O judge, marry her off.
The questioner : Is it permissible?
The Shaykh : It is permissible. How is it permissible? It is obligatory. It is obligatory to address the issue in this manner, as long as the girl is willing and he is suitable. And now, women are complaining about their fathers. They call us on the phone and complain about their fathers, saying they reject suitable husbands, either on the pretext that the man's religion is lax and he is not committed, or on the pretext that she is studying and they want her salary. Okay, brother, we must intervene, and it is obligatory. In truth, the government is negligent in this. It is negligent, and exaggerating the mahr is contrary to the Shari'ah. The story of 'Umar, if it is authentic, is in specific cases. And Allah the Mighty and Majestic says
you gave one of them a qintar
ءاتيتم إحداهن قنطاراWould you take it in injustice and manifest sin? (21) And how could you take it while you have gone in unto each other
أَتَأْخُذُونَهُ بُهْتاناً وَإِثْماً مُبِيناً * وَكَيْفَ تَأْخُذُونَهُ وَقَدْ أَفْضى بَعْضُكُمْ إِلى بَعْضٍThe questioner : Shaykh, now the problem of mahr is the main reason that makes them marry abroad.
The Shaykh : There is no doubt.
The questioner : Do they commit a sin for this?
The Shaykh : Who commits a sin?
The questioner : Meaning... does this one commit a sin?
The Shaykh : Yes, he commits a sin. Just as if the state took his wealth, let him be patient. This prevented his right, so let him be patient and seek reward, because we found problems. And now, the people abroad have started to look at Saudi youth with a bad eye. One man comes, marries for a week or two, and leaves, leaving her either to divorce her and let her go, which is the lesser of the two, or to leave her and... saying, "Perhaps I will come to the country a second time." Problems, meaning people have become like bulls and he-asses.
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : For four hundred dirhams, it was said, "It is as if you are carving silver from this mountain." Yes, he has the right to be angry. The mahr of the best of women is from four hundred to five hundred dirhams. The wives of the Messenger of Allah and his daughters did not exceed five hundred dirhams.
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : Huh?
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : Simple. Two hundred dirhams is fifty-six riyals. Two hundred dirhams is fifty-six riyals. How much is that?
The questioner : One hundred and twelve.
The Shaykh : One hundred and twelve. Add twenty-eight to it?
The questioner : One hundred and forty.
The Shaykh : Huh?
The questioner : One hundred and forty.
The Shaykh : One hundred and forty. This is easy. One hundred and forty. But you have made us feel bad. You said forty is cited as an example of smallness. May Allah guide him, Khalid. May Allah guide you. I do not know about him.
The questioner : Correct.
The Shaykh : In any case, I say these are issues, meaning a problem. The youth are between two things: either they travel, and I say this is rare, the establishment of the noon prayer, because the whole matter is anomalous. So this problem is our very difficult problem. It is feared that the youth will slip, because no matter how much the young man is patient, he cannot hold back. This is something Allah placed in the sons of Adam. And I tell you, it is not specific to men; even women cannot hold back now. And some women, with the expansion of the horizon now in information, and the fact that the woman reads, and that she hears, and that she is watched, have lost the modesty that was there before. It has gone from them. Now she is like the man. She calls a person and says, "Find me a halal son." Okay, did these women do this before? No. If it were said to her that a man proposed to her, she would cry night and day. So the result is that the matter has become a major problem in our society. And we ask Allah to guide the government to solve it, because it is a problem, a problem of the utmost degree. So we hope Allah will make it easy. Yes, okay.
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : Those whose consent or permission is not required are four categories. The first is Allah's slaves?
The questioner : The insane and...
The Shaykh : The insane, and the second?
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : And the third? And the fourth?
The questioner : The virgin.
The Shaykh : The virgin.
The questioner : Even if she is of age.
The Shaykh : Even if she is of age. Perfect. Who takes charge of marrying them without their permission? Hamad?
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : Marrying these four without their permission?
The questioner : This ... .
The Shaykh : Who...?
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : And the son?
The questioner : Yes?
The Shaykh : The son?
The questioner : No.
The Shaykh : Huh? Who?
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : The testator?
The questioner : The one in charge of affairs... after the death of...
The Shaykh : You did not review, O Ahmad. You did not review.
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : Leave it. You did not review.
The questioner : The father.
The Shaykh : And whom?
The questioner : ... the Sunnah...
The Shaykh : Be patient. The father, then?
The questioner : The entrusted one.
The Shaykh : The agent, meaning?
The questioner : The agent.
The Shaykh : Yes, wrong.
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : Wrong. The father and his agent in marriage. Okay. Does the grandfather marry these?
The questioner : He does not marry them.
The Shaykh : Very well.