Is it valid to place the marriage contract in the hands of the woman?
Machine translationRead the Arabic original
The questioner : The woman stipulated that ... .
The Shaykh : Did you not know that the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) saidSahih al-Bukhari 1462 , well, and is it possible for me to place the marriage contract, which is one of the most noble contracts and the greatest in danger, in the hands of a deficient woman?
The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : Glory be to Allah, be happy that if she goes out to the market and finds this handsome young man full of youth, and you are forty-five years old, she says, "Look, I divorce you with three divorces, a final divorce, a separation as far apart as the earth and the sky." By Allah, it is never permissible, but the option of choice is permissible. The option of choice is stipulated for a specific purpose, such as saying, "If I am pleased with the residence, the marriage remains, otherwise I have the option." Then it becomes clear that the residence is not pleasing, either due to bad treatment by the husband's parents or his brothers, or because the husband is a miser. In this case, she has the option. The option is clear for her for a purpose. But merely saying, "I have the right to divorce you," this does not happen.Sunan Ibn Majah 2081Da'if (Darussalam) And divorce is in the hands of the man. It is not possible to place it in the hands of women. Women are, in reality, deficient in intellect and religion. If she sees a young man better and more handsome than her husband, she might leave him. And it is possible that if he marries a woman who divorced him, she will be jealous immediately and divorce him. In this case, who is the waiting period upon? The waiting period is upon whom? The one who divorces or the one who is divorced?
The questioner : Does the husband have the right to give his wife her divorce?
The Shaykh : He can appoint her as his agent for divorce, there is no harm in that.
The questioner : That is, he appoints her such that at the time, if she wants the divorce, she divorces herself.
The Shaykh : Yes, there is no harm in that, because this is in his hand; if he wishes, he does not appoint her.
The questioner : A shaykh not present with us for this.
Another questioner: If it were said that this is a right of the husband ... the contract.
The Shaykh : This is not valid, may Allah reward you. First, it is a right of the husband if the contract is completed. If it is added after the contract, it is not added. If it is concurrent with the contract, it is not his right because he has not married. And Allah says[Al-Ahzab 33:49] .
The questioner : I say this is not present with us.
The Shaykh : Yes.
The questioner : Not present with us, this ...
The Shaykh : Praise be to Allah, how did you find this, Samih?
The questioner : This is from the sea, O Shaykh, and we ... .
The Shaykh : Is it authentic, and is there a difference between them?
The questioner : Yes, the Sa'idis do not have this talk.
Another questioner: ...
The Shaykh : ... like this, and by Allah, these are strange things. Do you know what the reason for this is? The reason is the attempt to make the woman like the man, yes, the attempt to make the woman like the man. And then they will place the marriage contract in her hand, yes, she proposes to the man and says to him, "I have married myself to you," is that right? Or he says, "I have married myself to you," correct. In any case, this is a view of a Western idea that the woman is equal to the man in rights. And this is ignorance that contradicts the fitrah (the innate natural disposition) and the nature in which Allah created the woman. The woman is deficient in everything. Look at her yourselves in the homes, how is her deficiency? Now, women, we give a simple example. If a fashion comes out in the morning in a certain form and she buys it, in the afternoon another fashion comes out and she buys it, in the morning, bring it, fill the houses with these clothes. It is never possible. And let us shorten this, O people, it is not that. There are many questions now, no, that is finished, the one after it.
The questioner : And blessings and peace be upon the most noble of the messengers. The author (may Allah have mercy on him) says: "Chapter on Conditions and Defects in Marriage. If she stipulates the divorce of her co-wife" ..
The Shaykh : No, we are done with it.
The questioner : Yes?
The Shaykh : The chapter after it.
The questioner : The chapter after it?
The Shaykh : Yes, it is the chapter after.
The questioner :"And if he stipulates that she has no mahr (bridal gift), or that there is no nafaqah (financial maintenance), or that he gives her less than her co-wife or more, or if he stipulates an option of choice for her, or that he brings the mahr at a certain time, otherwise there is no marriage between them, the stipulation is void and the marriage is valid.
And if he stipulates that she is a Muslim woman and she turns out to be a People of the Book, or if he stipulates that she is a virgin or beautiful or a relative, or denies a defect that does not annul the marriage, and she turns out to be the opposite, he has the right to annul. And if a slave woman is freed while under a free man, she has no option of choice, but she remains under a slave" .
The Shaykh : Did you not know that the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) said
I have not seen anyone more deficient in intelligence and religion than you. O women, some of you can lead a cautious wise man astray.
ما رأيت من ناقصات عقل ودين أذهب بلب الرجل الحازم من إحداهنThe questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : Glory be to Allah, be happy that if she goes out to the market and finds this handsome young man full of youth, and you are forty-five years old, she says, "Look, I divorce you with three divorces, a final divorce, a separation as far apart as the earth and the sky." By Allah, it is never permissible, but the option of choice is permissible. The option of choice is stipulated for a specific purpose, such as saying, "If I am pleased with the residence, the marriage remains, otherwise I have the option." Then it becomes clear that the residence is not pleasing, either due to bad treatment by the husband's parents or his brothers, or because the husband is a miser. In this case, she has the option. The option is clear for her for a purpose. But merely saying, "I have the right to divorce you," this does not happen.
Divorce belongs to the one who takes hold of the calf (i.e., her husband).
إنما الطلاق لمن أخذ بالساقThe questioner : Does the husband have the right to give his wife her divorce?
The Shaykh : He can appoint her as his agent for divorce, there is no harm in that.
The questioner : That is, he appoints her such that at the time, if she wants the divorce, she divorces herself.
The Shaykh : Yes, there is no harm in that, because this is in his hand; if he wishes, he does not appoint her.
The questioner : A shaykh not present with us for this.
Another questioner: If it were said that this is a right of the husband ... the contract.
The Shaykh : This is not valid, may Allah reward you. First, it is a right of the husband if the contract is completed. If it is added after the contract, it is not added. If it is concurrent with the contract, it is not his right because he has not married. And Allah says
when you marry believing women and then divorce them
إِذا نَكَحْتُمُ الْمُؤْمِناتِ ثُمَّ طَلَّقْتُمُوهُنَّThe questioner : I say this is not present with us.
The Shaykh : Yes.
The questioner : Not present with us, this ...
The Shaykh : Praise be to Allah, how did you find this, Samih?
The questioner : This is from the sea, O Shaykh, and we ... .
The Shaykh : Is it authentic, and is there a difference between them?
The questioner : Yes, the Sa'idis do not have this talk.
Another questioner: ...
The Shaykh : ... like this, and by Allah, these are strange things. Do you know what the reason for this is? The reason is the attempt to make the woman like the man, yes, the attempt to make the woman like the man. And then they will place the marriage contract in her hand, yes, she proposes to the man and says to him, "I have married myself to you," is that right? Or he says, "I have married myself to you," correct. In any case, this is a view of a Western idea that the woman is equal to the man in rights. And this is ignorance that contradicts the fitrah (the innate natural disposition) and the nature in which Allah created the woman. The woman is deficient in everything. Look at her yourselves in the homes, how is her deficiency? Now, women, we give a simple example. If a fashion comes out in the morning in a certain form and she buys it, in the afternoon another fashion comes out and she buys it, in the morning, bring it, fill the houses with these clothes. It is never possible. And let us shorten this, O people, it is not that. There are many questions now, no, that is finished, the one after it.
The questioner : And blessings and peace be upon the most noble of the messengers. The author (may Allah have mercy on him) says: "Chapter on Conditions and Defects in Marriage. If she stipulates the divorce of her co-wife" ..
The Shaykh : No, we are done with it.
The questioner : Yes?
The Shaykh : The chapter after it.
The questioner : The chapter after it?
The Shaykh : Yes, it is the chapter after.
The questioner :"And if he stipulates that she has no mahr (bridal gift), or that there is no nafaqah (financial maintenance), or that he gives her less than her co-wife or more, or if he stipulates an option of choice for her, or that he brings the mahr at a certain time, otherwise there is no marriage between them, the stipulation is void and the marriage is valid.
And if he stipulates that she is a Muslim woman and she turns out to be a People of the Book, or if he stipulates that she is a virgin or beautiful or a relative, or denies a defect that does not annul the marriage, and she turns out to be the opposite, he has the right to annul. And if a slave woman is freed while under a free man, she has no option of choice, but she remains under a slave" .