Explanation of the words of Imam al-Nawawi (may Allah have mercy on him) regarding what he quoted: "
Machine translationRead the Arabic original
The Shaykh : In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful:
These hadiths are in the explanation of maintaining the ties of kinship and dutifulness to parents. Among them is the hadith of Zayd ibn Khalid al-Ansari:. The point here is where he said: . Thus, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him and his family) made maintaining the ties of kinship one of the causes that admit a person to Paradise and keep him far from the Fire.
There is no doubt that every person strives for this great gain: to be saved from the Fire and to enter Paradise. For whoever is kept far from the Fire and admitted to Paradise has truly succeeded. Everyone strives for this, and it is achieved through these four matters:
Worship Allah and do not associate anything with Him, neither minor shirk nor major shirk.
And the second: establish the prayer, performing it completely in its times with the congregation if you are a man, and without the congregation if you are a woman.
And give the zakah: pay what Allah has made obligatory upon you of zakah in your wealth to its rightful recipient.
And maintain the ties of kinship: give them their right through connection. The connection is according to what people recognize as such. What people consider to be maintaining the tie is maintaining the tie, and what they do not consider to be maintaining the tie is not maintaining the tie, except if a person is in a society that does not care about relatives or take an interest in them. In that case, the criterion is the connection itself that is recognized by the Shari'ah.
Then he mentioned the hadith of Salman ibn 'Amir, or Sulayman ibn 'Amir al-Dubbi, regarding breaking the fast with dates, and if he does not find them, then with water. And that charity to the poor person is charity, and to the relative it is two: charity and maintaining the tie.
For this reason, the scholars said: If two poor people are present, one of whom is a relative of yours and the other is not, the one who is your relative is more deserving, because he is more entitled to the maintenance of the tie.
Then he mentioned the hadith of 'Abdullah ibn 'Umar (may Allah be pleased with them both):.
And likewise the other hadith: about a woman who ordered her son to divorce his wife. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him and his family) made clear that maintaining the ties of kinship or dutifulness to parents is a cause for entering Paradise. This is an indication that if he was dutiful to his mother by divorcing his wife, that would be a cause for his entering Paradise.
But not every parent who orders his son to divorce his wife must be obeyed. A man asked Imam Ahmad ibn Hanbal (may Allah have mercy on him), saying: “My father says: ‘Divorce your wife,’ but I love her.” He said: “Do not divorce her.” He said: “Has not the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him and his family) ordered Ibn 'Umar to divorce his wife when 'Umar ordered him to?” Imam Ahmad said to him: “Is your father 'Umar?” Because we know with certainty that 'Umar would not order 'Abdullah to divorce his wife except for a Shari'ah reason, which Ibn 'Umar may not have known. It is impossible that 'Umar would order his son to divorce his wife to separate him from her without a Shari'ah reason. That is far-fetched.
Therefore, if your father or your mother orders you to divorce your wife, and you love her and you do not find a Shari'ah fault with her, do not divorce her. Because this is one of the private matters in which no one intervenes between a person and his wife. And success is from Allah.
These hadiths are in the explanation of maintaining the ties of kinship and dutifulness to parents. Among them is the hadith of Zayd ibn Khalid al-Ansari:
That he asked the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) about a deed that would admit him to Paradise and keep him far from the Fire, so he said to him: “Worship Allah and do not associate anything with Him, and establish the prayer, and give the zakah, and maintain the ties of kinship.”
أنه سأل النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم عن عمل يدخله الجنة ويباعده من النار، فقال له: تعبد الله لا تشرك به شيئاً، وتقيم الصلاة، وتؤتي الزكاة، وتصل الرحمMaintain the ties of kinship.
تصل الرحمThere is no doubt that every person strives for this great gain: to be saved from the Fire and to enter Paradise. For whoever is kept far from the Fire and admitted to Paradise has truly succeeded. Everyone strives for this, and it is achieved through these four matters:
Worship Allah and do not associate anything with Him, neither minor shirk nor major shirk.
And the second: establish the prayer, performing it completely in its times with the congregation if you are a man, and without the congregation if you are a woman.
And give the zakah: pay what Allah has made obligatory upon you of zakah in your wealth to its rightful recipient.
And maintain the ties of kinship: give them their right through connection. The connection is according to what people recognize as such. What people consider to be maintaining the tie is maintaining the tie, and what they do not consider to be maintaining the tie is not maintaining the tie, except if a person is in a society that does not care about relatives or take an interest in them. In that case, the criterion is the connection itself that is recognized by the Shari'ah.
Then he mentioned the hadith of Salman ibn 'Amir, or Sulayman ibn 'Amir al-Dubbi, regarding breaking the fast with dates, and if he does not find them, then with water. And that charity to the poor person is charity, and to the relative it is two: charity and maintaining the tie.
For this reason, the scholars said: If two poor people are present, one of whom is a relative of yours and the other is not, the one who is your relative is more deserving, because he is more entitled to the maintenance of the tie.
Then he mentioned the hadith of 'Abdullah ibn 'Umar (may Allah be pleased with them both):
That he had a wife whom he loved, so his father ordered him to divorce her, but he refused to do so because he loved her. So 'Umar mentioned this to the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him and his family), and he ordered Ibn 'Umar to divorce her.
أنه له امرأة يحبها، فأمره أبوه أن يطلقها، ولكنه أبى ذلك، لأنه يحبها، فذكر عمر ذلك للنبي صلى الله عليه وآله وسلم، فأمرَ ابن عمر بطلاقهاAnd likewise the other hadith: about a woman who ordered her son to divorce his wife. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him and his family) made clear that maintaining the ties of kinship or dutifulness to parents is a cause for entering Paradise. This is an indication that if he was dutiful to his mother by divorcing his wife, that would be a cause for his entering Paradise.
But not every parent who orders his son to divorce his wife must be obeyed. A man asked Imam Ahmad ibn Hanbal (may Allah have mercy on him), saying: “My father says: ‘Divorce your wife,’ but I love her.” He said: “Do not divorce her.” He said: “Has not the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him and his family) ordered Ibn 'Umar to divorce his wife when 'Umar ordered him to?” Imam Ahmad said to him: “Is your father 'Umar?” Because we know with certainty that 'Umar would not order 'Abdullah to divorce his wife except for a Shari'ah reason, which Ibn 'Umar may not have known. It is impossible that 'Umar would order his son to divorce his wife to separate him from her without a Shari'ah reason. That is far-fetched.
Therefore, if your father or your mother orders you to divorce your wife, and you love her and you do not find a Shari'ah fault with her, do not divorce her. Because this is one of the private matters in which no one intervenes between a person and his wife. And success is from Allah.