Our father discriminates between us, the girls, and the boys, favors the boys greatly, hates us, the girls, and takes an omen from us. What is the ruling on his action? May you be rewarded.
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The questioner : May Allah reward you. The questioner says: Our father discriminates between us, the girls, and the boys, favors the boys greatly, hates us, the girls, and takes an omen from us. What is the ruling on his action? May you be rewarded?
The Shaykh : This action is from the practices of the pre-Islamic age of ignorance, for the people of the pre-Islamic age of ignorance are those who detest females and prefer males. Allah the Exalted said:[An-Nahl 16:58-59].
Let this man fear Allah and be just between his children, for the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:Sahih al-Bukhari 2587.
And if we look to reason, we find that the daughter is more deserving of gentleness and tenderness than the son, for the son endures and is patient, while the daughter is the opposite. Look at this in the case of a calamity: you will find the son is patient, and you will find the daughter crying because she cannot endure it.
So if justice were not obligatory, I would say that being gentle with the daughter and considering her is more deserving. But I say that justice is obligatory.
Therefore, if he gives the boy a dirham, he should give the girl half a dirham, and if he gives him two dirhams, he should give her one dirham, based on the saying of the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him):Sahih al-Bukhari 2587. And there is no justice more perfect than the justice of Allah, and Allah Mighty and Majestic said: [An-Nisa 4:11].
The Shaykh : This action is from the practices of the pre-Islamic age of ignorance, for the people of the pre-Islamic age of ignorance are those who detest females and prefer males. Allah the Exalted said:
(58) And when one of them is informed of [the birth of] a female, his face becomes dark, and he suppresses grief. (59) He hides himself from the people because of the ill of which he has been informed. Should he keep it in humiliation or bury it in the ground? Unquestionably, evil is what they decide.
وإذا بشر أحدهم بالأنثى ظل وجهه مسودا وهو كظيم يتوارى من القوم من سوء ما بشر به أيمسكه على هون أم يدسه في التراب ألا ساء ما يحكمونLet this man fear Allah and be just between his children, for the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:
Be afraid of Allah, and be just to your children.
اتقوا الله واعدلوا بين أولادكمAnd if we look to reason, we find that the daughter is more deserving of gentleness and tenderness than the son, for the son endures and is patient, while the daughter is the opposite. Look at this in the case of a calamity: you will find the son is patient, and you will find the daughter crying because she cannot endure it.
So if justice were not obligatory, I would say that being gentle with the daughter and considering her is more deserving. But I say that justice is obligatory.
Therefore, if he gives the boy a dirham, he should give the girl half a dirham, and if he gives him two dirhams, he should give her one dirham, based on the saying of the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him):