The Meaning of the Hadith: "Do Not Repel the Hand of the Toucher"?

The Shaykh : What does the phrase "do not repel the hand of the toucher" mean? Many scholars, both past and present, imagine that the meaning of this phrase is that she is submissive to anyone who desires her, but that is not the case. If that were the case, it would not be permissible for the Messenger to say to him Far be it from the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) to command a husband who is a "diyyuth" (one who does not guard his wife) and sees a transgression in his wife, and then say to him"Because you love her." So what does "do not repel the hand of the toucher" mean? The "touch" here is in its literal sense. The "touch" here is not like the saying of Allah the Exalted meaning intercourse. So the "touch" here is in its literal sense. The "touch" is like this or like this, meaning groping. Indeed, many women, even today, are seen in some villages that, first, still live on an old innate disposition, and second, have no one to guide them and teach the rulings of the Shari'ah. From ... that, there is some free mixing of men and women, and between young men and young women ... like this. So, for example, they stand next to the house. The male neighbor with his female neighbor, a young man and a young woman, and they talk. These conversations may be innocent in their origin, peasant talk: "Where did your father go? Where did he come from? What did you do with the harvest?" and so on. But here Satan enters the heart of that young man. So he is talking to the girl, and suddenly he pinches her, saying to her, for example, "Come on, go ahead, come on, go ahead ... ."

The questioner : How is your father, Shaykh?

The Shaykh : Yes?

The questioner : How is your father?

The Shaykh : Yes? This is the touch. It does not mean it is a euphemism for sin and intercourse. No. And there is no doubt that this is something every jealous husband would condemn. And this is what drove the man to complain of his situation to the Messenger. So he said to him "Divorce her and be free of her." He said, "O Messenger of Allah, I love her." He said .
So the matter revolved around realizing a benefit and what? Removing a harm. The ultimate harm here is that if he divorces her, it is feared that his heart will remain attached to her, and she becomes what? A stranger to him after he divorces her. Therefore, the position of the Messenger (peace be upon him) here was at the peak of wisdom. He first clarified the Shari'ah ruling to him and said to him "Divorce her and be free of her." When the Prophet was surprised by his saying "I love her," he directed him to the lesser of the two harms and the less evil of the two harms, and said to him, so . So when a man comes to us today and relates to us a story like the story of Ibn 'Umar with his father, I answer him with two answers. One is conditional on the impossible, and the other is "I don't know what you do." I clarify the matter for him as ... As for the first matter, which is related to the impossible, I say to him: If your father is in his knowledge of Islam and his adherence to the rulings like 'Umar, then you must divorce her. You must divorce her.

The questioner : This is the miraculous nature, O Shaykh.

The Shaykh : Yes, indeed, . As for the details, I say, by Allah, my brother, there is a problem in both matters, as I explained earlier regarding the man to whom he (peace be upon him) said and then said to him . So I fear that if I tell you to divorce her, you may have obeyed in one aspect, but I fear for you that you will fall into a greater prohibition, which is that your soul will go with this woman you divorced, and you will fall into a greater problem, especially since our time today is like that time.

The questioner : Yes.

The Shaykh : There is no longer any taqwa (mindfulness of Allah) or wara' (scrupulousness), and I fear that if I tell you not to divorce her, it would be as if I am telling you to disobey your father.

The questioner : Yes.

The Shaykh : And therefore, I am narrating to you the following hadith. A man came to Abu al-Darda' and asked him a question like this: "My mother orders me to divorce my wife. What should I do?" He said to him "I do not order you to divorce her, nor to keep her, but I tell you what I heard from the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) saying:

The father is the middle door of Paradise

الوالد أوسط أبواب الجنة

Sunan Ibn Majah 3663Hasan (Darussalam)

The hadith ends. If you wish, divorce her, and if you wish, keep her." And the whole matter is for me to ... avoid it. Why? So that he does not involve himself in such a fatwa (scholarly legal ruling) where one's foot may slip. One's foot may slip. So I tell you that the parent is the middle gate of Paradise, meaning that obeying him leads you to what? To Paradise. If you wish, divorce her, and if you wish, keep her.

The questioner : Meaning, consult your heart, O Shaykh.

The Shaykh : ... .

The questioner : May Allah reward you with good.
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