Some of my friends insult and curse me. Should I respond to them in kind? Or what should I do?
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The questioner : Some of my friends curse and insult me. Should I respond to them in kind, or what should I do?
The Shaykh : Look at the benefit in that. If the benefit requires leaving them, boycotting them, and not responding to them with what they said, then do so. If the benefit requires the opposite, you have the right to respond to them with what they did to you, based on the saying of Allah the Exalted: and His saying: [Ash-Shuraa 42:41-42].
Except if you are fasting, in which case it is better not to respond to them, based on the saying of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him):Sahih Muslim 1151a This is an exception to what we mentioned first. It is also an exception if they curse your father; you do not curse his father, because that is aggression against the father, meaning his father, for he did not insult you.
The questioner : May Allah bless you.
The Shaykh : Look at the benefit in that. If the benefit requires leaving them, boycotting them, and not responding to them with what they said, then do so. If the benefit requires the opposite, you have the right to respond to them with what they did to you, based on the saying of Allah the Exalted:
And the recompense for an evil is an evil like it
وَجَزَاءُ سَيِّئَةٍ سَيِّئَةٌ مِثْلُهَا(41) And whoever avenges himself after having been wronged - those have not upon them any cause [for blame]. (42) The cause is only against the ones who wrong the people and tyrannize upon the earth without right. Those will have a painful punishment.
وَلَمَنِ انتَصَرَ بَعْدَ ظُلْمِهِ فَأُوْلَئِكَ مَا عَلَيْهِمْ مِنْ سَبِيلٍ * إِنَّمَا السَّبِيلُ عَلَى الَّذِينَ يَظْلِمُونَ النَّاسَ وَيَبْغُونَ فِي الأَرْضِ بِغَيْرِ الْحَقِّ أُوْلَئِكَ لَهُمْ عَذَابٌ أَلِيمٌExcept if you are fasting, in which case it is better not to respond to them, based on the saying of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him):
And if anyone slanders him or quarrels with him, he should say:" I am fasting
إن امرئ شاتمه أو قاتله فليقل: إني صائمThe questioner : May Allah bless you.