Is the default in marriage plural marriage?

The questioner : In the name of Allah. All praise is due to Allah; we praise Him, seek His help, and seek His forgiveness, and we seek refuge in Allah from the evil of our own souls and from the evil of our deeds. Whomsoever Allah guides, none can misguide, and whomsoever He leaves to misguide, none can guide. And I bear witness that there is no deity but Allah alone, with no partner, and I bear witness that Muhammad is His slave and His Messenger. As for what follows, the truest of speech is the speech of Allah, the best of guidance is the guidance of Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him), and the worst of matters are those that are newly invented, and every newly invented matter is a religious innovation, and every religious innovation is misguidance. Then a question came from the women, asking: The questioner regarding the saying of the Exalted, She asks whether this verse should be interpreted to mean that the original ruling in marriage is plural marriage, and that the exception of marrying one woman applies in specific cases. She then adds to this question: Is it permissible for a woman whose husband has married another to request a divorce, unless his second marriage causes her moral harm? And a final question: Is it permissible to strike children for their discipline?

The Shaykh : I repeat these three questions, the first.

The questioner : Do you interpret this verse to mean that the default in marriage is plural marriage, and that the exception of marrying one woman is for special cases?

The Shaykh : The truth is that the verse has no relation, neither negative nor positive, to establishing that the default is plural marriage or that it is not plural marriage. Rather, the verse indicates the explicit permission for the Muslim man to marry two, three, or four, on the condition of achieving material justice between the wives. This is all that this Quranic text addresses. As for whether the default is plural marriage or singular marriage, this is a matter not taken from this verse, but rather from other texts. We have been asked this question more than once, and my answer was that what I believe and testify to Allah is that the default upon which the practice of the early Muslims proceeded was marrying more than one woman. Many of the early Muslims did not restrict themselves to one wife, such as Abu Bakr, Ali, and their like among the great Companions. And this plural marriage brings benefit to the Muslim community by increasing its numbers. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) pointed to this reality when he said: meaning by the increase in the number of the Muslim community. He said: He did not encourage marrying a barren woman, but rather a fertile one, for this reason. There is no doubt that increasing the number of wives achieves this desire that the Messenger (peace be upon him) pointed to in this hadith. I wish to mention on this occasion something I perhaps do not address often: Muslims, men and women, are living today a material European life. I mean, when a Muslim couple marries, there is no great difference between their marriage and the marriage of a European man to a European woman, a disbeliever to a disbeliever! Whereas there should be a very clear difference between the two marriages: the marriage of a Muslim to a Muslim woman and the marriage of a disbeliever to a disbeliever. That is because it is assumed of the Muslim that if he marries a Muslim woman, he does not intend only to satisfy his desire and lust, nor should she intend only to satisfy her desire and lust. Rather, they should seek behind their marriage something else, namely increasing the numbers of the Islamic community. This increase brings psychological and educational benefits. For example, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said in the authentic hadith: This meaning, to which this authentic hadith drew the attention of Muslims, is not something that disbelievers think about: leaving behind a righteous child who will pray for them. Disbelievers do not think about this. If one leaves behind two children, that is better than leaving behind one, and three is better than two, and so on. Also, the Muslim should think about what if he is blessed with a child and then he dies and Allah takes back His trust. His position regarding the death of his child, the flesh of his heart, as it is said, should not be like the position of the disbeliever when his child dies. The disbeliever, when his child dies, dies with those of his family who died, with grief behind him, and anger and rage at the decree of Allah (Mighty and Majestic) and His will. As for the Muslim, when Allah (Mighty and Majestic) commands him in His saying: The disbeliever does not think about all these things. Likewise, the Muslim should, if a child dies for him, count him as a reward with Allah (Mighty and Majestic), so that it becomes a barrier between him and the Fire, as he (peace be upon him) said in the authentic hadith: They said: "And two, O Messenger of Allah?" He said: The narrator said: "Until we thought that if we said 'and one,' he would say 'and one.'" So there is a great virtue in the Muslim leaving behind offspring, in that if they live, they will succeed him with righteous prayer and righteous deeds, and the good of this righteous prayer and righteous deeds will reach him in his grave, where he is most in need of it, for Allah (Mighty and Majestic) says: And the child is from the effort of his father, and this is explicit in his saying: All these meanings are not known to disbelievers, and they are not in their religion, despite its changes and alterations. As for Islam, praise be to Allah, it remains fresh and green as it was revealed, with the knowledgeable people who know it. So if a Muslim marries one woman and is blessed with a child or more from her, there is nothing preventing him from marrying another woman. First, to protect himself; second, to protect her; third, to seek from her offspring and righteous descendants, so that the rewards of these descendants continue after his death and her death. Therefore, if we notice these differences between Muslim marriage and disbeliever marriage, women, let alone men, should not stop at maintaining one wife and not increasing beyond her, claiming that this is the default. No, there is nothing in Islam, as we said regarding the verse, that indicates that the default is plural marriage or the opposite. But what I mentioned earlier from the evidence confirms that if a Muslim is able to marry more than one woman, that is better for him, in terms of the reward that reaches him while he is in his grave. But as I said and I continue to say, the one who wants to proceed to a second marriage should think carefully. I do not say this from the original ruling. No, we encourage the second, third, and fourth marriage. But because the upbringing now is not good and not Islamic, and this Muslim society is invaded by European ideas, and one of their effects is the spread of such a question, in addition to the fact that many men, let alone women, do not see the permissibility of plural marriage except in the limits of dire necessity. This is a lie and a slander upon Allah (Mighty and Majestic). Our Lord (Mighty and Majestic) did not condition dire necessity for the second marriage, but He conditioned only one thing, namely justice. And the possible justice, not the impossible justice. That is justice in division, in lodging, and residence, and the like of the possible matters. As for justice of the heart, that is impossible and cannot be done, and Allah does not burden His servants with achieving this justice of the heart, which is that the husband loves the two, or three, or four wives with the same love if he gathers them. This is not possible. But he can house them in one house, clothe them in one clothing...

The questioner : What does one house mean?

The Shaykh : Keep your question, because you have questions. In summary, the wise Lawgiver encourages plural marriage and does not make the default the absence of plural marriage, but rather He conditions one condition for it, which is justice between the women.