Is it permissible for a man to prevent his wife from visiting her parents because they engage in actions that violate the Shari'ah, such as circumambulating shrines, calling for aid, and seeking blessing?
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The questioner : Noble Shaykh, is it permissible for me to prevent my wife from visiting her parents, given that they engage in actions that violate the Islamic Shari'ah, such as circumambulating shrines, calling for aid from them, and seeking blessing from the awliya (close friends of Allah)? This is out of my fear that my wife might fall into these matters of shirk (associating partners with Allah)?
The Shaykh : Your wife visiting her relatives, especially if her parents are among those who are dutiful and maintain family ties. Allah the Exalted said:[Luqman 31:14-15] Thus, Allah commanded treating the parents with kindness in this world, even though they are mushrikin (those who associate partners with Allah) and strive to lead their child to shirk (associating partners with Allah). This indicates that sins do not necessitate severing family ties or undutifulness to parents.
Rather, maintain your family ties and be dutiful to your parents. If you need something from the matters of this world, there is no blame on you in seeking their help, for they are your parents. It is recommended that when you allow your wife to visit her relatives while they are in this state, you urge her to advise them and clarify the truth to them, for perhaps their guidance will come through your hand. It is established from the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) that he said to 'Ali ibn Abi Talib:Sahih al-Bukhari 3701.
The Shaykh : Your wife visiting her relatives, especially if her parents are among those who are dutiful and maintain family ties. Allah the Exalted said:
(14) And We have enjoined upon man [care] for his parents. His mother carried him, [increasing her] in weakness upon weakness, and his weaning is in two years. Be grateful to Me and to your parents; to Me is the [final] destination. (15) But if they endeavor to make you associate with Me that of which you have no knowledge, do not obey them but accompany them in [this] world with appropriate kindness and follow the way of those who turn back to Me [in repentance]. Then to Me will be your return, and I will inform you about what you used to do.
وَوَصَّيْنَا الإِنسَانَ بِوَالِدَيْهِ حَمَلَتْهُ أُمُّهُ وَهْنًا عَلَى وَهْنٍ وَفِصَالُهُ فِي عَامَيْنِ أَنِ اشْكُرْ لِي وَلِوَالِدَيْكَ إِلَيَّ الْمَصِيرُ * وَإِنْ جَاهَدَاكَ عَلى أَنْ تُشْرِكَ بِي مَا لَيْسَ لَكَ بِهِ عِلْمٌ فَلا تُطِعْهُمَا وَصَاحِبْهُمَا فِي الدُّنْيَا مَعْرُوفًاRather, maintain your family ties and be dutiful to your parents. If you need something from the matters of this world, there is no blame on you in seeking their help, for they are your parents. It is recommended that when you allow your wife to visit her relatives while they are in this state, you urge her to advise them and clarify the truth to them, for perhaps their guidance will come through your hand. It is established from the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) that he said to 'Ali ibn Abi Talib: