A woman conceals the allowance she gives to her son from her husband in order to spend on the child and the household because his father is very strict; is this permissible?
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The questioner : In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
A woman says: She has a son, and this son receives an allowance from the school, and his father is very strict, so he says: No money comes in unless it is given to me.
So this woman conceals this money that comes in on the pretext that she is spending on this son and what the house requires, because if she asked this man, he would give her a small amount, and it would lead to disputes or something of that sort. What is your opinion on this?
The Shaykh : As for what she withholds from the father in order to spend on the son, there is nothing wrong with it. As for spending on the house, it is not permissible for her to take from the son's money, because the maintenance of the house is the father's responsibility; he is the one who is obligated to provide. She may take from the father's money to spend on the house, even if he does not know.
Because the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) issued a ruling for Hind bint 'Utbah when she came complaining about Abu Sufyan, saying that he is a stingy man who does not give her what is sufficient for her and her son. He said:Sunan Ibn Majah 2293Sahih (Darussalam).
The questioner : Now, what if the son himself conceals it, on the basis that he is spending on himself, meaning he might be afraid of his father?
The Shaykh : The important thing is that as long as he is in need of maintenance, there is nothing wrong with him concealing from his father what he needs for his maintenance.
The questioner : May Allah reward you with good.
A woman says: She has a son, and this son receives an allowance from the school, and his father is very strict, so he says: No money comes in unless it is given to me.
So this woman conceals this money that comes in on the pretext that she is spending on this son and what the house requires, because if she asked this man, he would give her a small amount, and it would lead to disputes or something of that sort. What is your opinion on this?
The Shaykh : As for what she withholds from the father in order to spend on the son, there is nothing wrong with it. As for spending on the house, it is not permissible for her to take from the son's money, because the maintenance of the house is the father's responsibility; he is the one who is obligated to provide. She may take from the father's money to spend on the house, even if he does not know.
Because the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) issued a ruling for Hind bint 'Utbah when she came complaining about Abu Sufyan, saying that he is a stingy man who does not give her what is sufficient for her and her son. He said:
Take what is sufficient for you and your child, on a reasonable basis.
خذي ما يكفيك وولدك بالمعروفThe questioner : Now, what if the son himself conceals it, on the basis that he is spending on himself, meaning he might be afraid of his father?
The Shaykh : The important thing is that as long as he is in need of maintenance, there is nothing wrong with him concealing from his father what he needs for his maintenance.
The questioner : May Allah reward you with good.