I married one of my relatives and we had two children, and it became clear to me after the birth that she is my foster sister. Should I separate from her, and what is the ruling on this?
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The questioner : This questioner, in truth, says: I married one of my relatives and we had two children, and it became clear to me after the birth that she is my foster sister. Should I separate from her, and what is the ruling on this? May Allah reward you both.
The Shaykh : Yes. The answer to this question requires several matters.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : First, what is the breastfeeding that creates a prohibition? The breastfeeding that creates a prohibition is five breastfeedings or more, with each breastfeeding separate from the others. For example, the first breastfeeding is at one o'clock, the second at two o'clock, the third at three o'clock, the fourth at four o'clock, and the fifth at five o'clock. If a child breastfeeds once, even if he becomes full, or twice, even if he becomes full, or three times, even if he becomes full, or four times, even if he becomes full, then that has no effect. This is based on what Muslim narrated in his Sahih from Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her), who said: "Among what was revealed of the Qur'an were ten breastfeedings that create a prohibition, but they were abrogated by five known breastfeedings. Then the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him and his family) passed away, and it was still being recited in the Qur'an". That is, it was abrogated, but some of the Companions did not know of the abrogation, so they continued to recite it after the death of the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him and his family). However, some of the Companions knew of the abrogation, so they stopped reciting it. For this reason, you do not find the number of breastfeedings in the Qur'an; rather, it contains only the saying of Allah the Exalted:[An-Nisa 4:23] [Al-Baqarah 2:233] [At-Talaq 65:6]. It does not contain anything specific regarding a number, but the Sunnah clarified that.
Second, it is recommended for one who has breastfed from a woman to record her name and to record whom she breastfed, so that no error occurs in this matter. This is because sometimes the breastfeeding is not clarified until after the marriage contract is concluded, and perhaps it is not clarified until after the children are born, in which case separation becomes difficult.
Third, it is recommended that the breastfeeding be publicized and spread among the family so that it is not forgotten. Even if the breastfeeding is recorded on a paper, the paper might be lost or torn, and the breastfeeding might be forgotten. If it becomes well-known among the family that so-and-so breastfed from so-and-so, and this nursing woman or her daughters meet this breastfed child and uncover themselves in front of him, then the breastfeeding becomes well-known and spread, and there is safety from it being forgotten and an error occurring at that time or later. We answer the question of the brother who married a woman from among his relatives, then she bore him children, and then it became clear afterwards that she is his foster sister. Should he separate from her or not? We say: Yes, he must separate from her, because the marriage contract has been revealed to be invalid, so separation is obligatory. However, the children who were born before that are legitimate children in relation to you. They are your children, just as they are the children of their mother. This is because a child born from intercourse under doubt is attributed to the one who had intercourse, because the Shari'ah is eager to establish lineage and attribute it to a known person. Thus, intercourse under doubt, if it results in a child, necessitates that the child be attributed to the one who had intercourse. Yes.
The questioner : May Allah bless you.
The Shaykh : Yes. The answer to this question requires several matters.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : First, what is the breastfeeding that creates a prohibition? The breastfeeding that creates a prohibition is five breastfeedings or more, with each breastfeeding separate from the others. For example, the first breastfeeding is at one o'clock, the second at two o'clock, the third at three o'clock, the fourth at four o'clock, and the fifth at five o'clock. If a child breastfeeds once, even if he becomes full, or twice, even if he becomes full, or three times, even if he becomes full, or four times, even if he becomes full, then that has no effect. This is based on what Muslim narrated in his Sahih from Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her), who said: "Among what was revealed of the Qur'an were ten breastfeedings that create a prohibition, but they were abrogated by five known breastfeedings. Then the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him and his family) passed away, and it was still being recited in the Qur'an". That is, it was abrogated, but some of the Companions did not know of the abrogation, so they continued to recite it after the death of the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him and his family). However, some of the Companions knew of the abrogation, so they stopped reciting it. For this reason, you do not find the number of breastfeedings in the Qur'an; rather, it contains only the saying of Allah the Exalted:
your [milk] mothers who nursed you
وَأُمَّهاتُكُمُ اللّاتي أَرضَعنَكُمMothers may breastfeed their children
وَالوالِداتُ يُرضِعنَ أَولادَهُنَّAnd if they breastfeed for you, then give them their payment
فَإِن أَرضَعنَ لَكُم فَآتوهُنَّ أُجورَهُنَّSecond, it is recommended for one who has breastfed from a woman to record her name and to record whom she breastfed, so that no error occurs in this matter. This is because sometimes the breastfeeding is not clarified until after the marriage contract is concluded, and perhaps it is not clarified until after the children are born, in which case separation becomes difficult.
Third, it is recommended that the breastfeeding be publicized and spread among the family so that it is not forgotten. Even if the breastfeeding is recorded on a paper, the paper might be lost or torn, and the breastfeeding might be forgotten. If it becomes well-known among the family that so-and-so breastfed from so-and-so, and this nursing woman or her daughters meet this breastfed child and uncover themselves in front of him, then the breastfeeding becomes well-known and spread, and there is safety from it being forgotten and an error occurring at that time or later. We answer the question of the brother who married a woman from among his relatives, then she bore him children, and then it became clear afterwards that she is his foster sister. Should he separate from her or not? We say: Yes, he must separate from her, because the marriage contract has been revealed to be invalid, so separation is obligatory. However, the children who were born before that are legitimate children in relation to you. They are your children, just as they are the children of their mother. This is because a child born from intercourse under doubt is attributed to the one who had intercourse, because the Shari'ah is eager to establish lineage and attribute it to a known person. Thus, intercourse under doubt, if it results in a child, necessitates that the child be attributed to the one who had intercourse. Yes.
The questioner : May Allah bless you.