Some sisters complain about the rejection of suitable suitors by the guardians; what is your advice?
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The questioner : But some sisters also complain about the rejection of suitable suitors by the guardians. So what is your advice in such a case?
The Shaykh : Our advice is that these people should fear Allah and be in awe of Allah (Mighty and Majestic). Do they not desire [marriage]?
If they desire it, then women desire it as well. So why do they prevent women from what they want, when they know the hardship it causes them, as is evident?
Let every person know that he is accountable before Allah (Mighty and Majestic) for implementing the saying of the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him):Jami` at-Tirmidhi 1084Da'if (Darussalam) and for his guardianship over this poor girl who wants men just as they want women. Perhaps fitnah, evil, and corruption will result from these people preventing their daughters from marrying.
Let him know that the father, who is the most entitled of the guardians, if he refuses to marry his daughter to a suitable match in religion and character, she has the right—indeed, her guardians after him have the right—to marry her off against his will and despite his objection. If the relatives do not do so and say, "What business do we have with in-laws?"
Then it is obligatory for the judge to marry her off. It is obligatory upon him, strictly obligatory, to marry her off if the suitor is suitable in religion and character and the woman consents. If we followed this course, many problems would be resolved.
The questioner : May Allah bless you, O honorable Shaykh.
The Shaykh : Our advice is that these people should fear Allah and be in awe of Allah (Mighty and Majestic). Do they not desire [marriage]?
If they desire it, then women desire it as well. So why do they prevent women from what they want, when they know the hardship it causes them, as is evident?
Let every person know that he is accountable before Allah (Mighty and Majestic) for implementing the saying of the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him):
When someone whose religion and character you are pleased with proposes to (someone under the care) of one of you, then marry to him.
إذا أتاكم من ترضون دينه وخلقه فزوجوهLet him know that the father, who is the most entitled of the guardians, if he refuses to marry his daughter to a suitable match in religion and character, she has the right—indeed, her guardians after him have the right—to marry her off against his will and despite his objection. If the relatives do not do so and say, "What business do we have with in-laws?"
Then it is obligatory for the judge to marry her off. It is obligatory upon him, strictly obligatory, to marry her off if the suitor is suitable in religion and character and the woman consents. If we followed this course, many problems would be resolved.
The questioner : May Allah bless you, O honorable Shaykh.