This letter complains about a custom that has spread among or in Islamic circles, namely that the groom enters upon his bride, or the bride upon her groom, at a women’s gathering.
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The questioner : This letter complains about a custom that has spread among or in Islamic circles, namely that the groom enters upon his bride, or the bride upon her groom, at a women’s gathering and sits with her for a period of time. The women present cover themselves and veil their faces, but the questioner asks: Is this permissible? And if it is not permissible, what is the wisdom behind that?
The Shaykh : We say that this custom is an ugly one.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : And given what it leads to in terms of the arousal of desire and the occurrence of fitnah (trial, discord or temptation), we see that it must be prevented, and that it is not permissible to do it, because the Shari'ah (Islamic sacred law) blocks the means leading to forbidden matters, especially when the means is strong. There is no doubt that if the married man is present on the wedding night and sits with his wife on the stage in this state, while the people are in a state of joy and happiness and in the midst of wedding activities, then there is no doubt that desire will be aroused, especially if the husband kisses his wife, touches her, hands her food, or does something similar. In this, there is a fitnah (trial, discord or temptation) that necessitates that a person rule it as tahrim (prohibition). What we see is that this is something to be avoided and left alone, and that people should stick to their old customs which involve complete covering, modesty, and distance from the signs of fitnah (trial, discord or temptation).
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : This is the answer, and this is the reasoning.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : We say that this custom is an ugly one.
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : And given what it leads to in terms of the arousal of desire and the occurrence of fitnah (trial, discord or temptation), we see that it must be prevented, and that it is not permissible to do it, because the Shari'ah (Islamic sacred law) blocks the means leading to forbidden matters, especially when the means is strong. There is no doubt that if the married man is present on the wedding night and sits with his wife on the stage in this state, while the people are in a state of joy and happiness and in the midst of wedding activities, then there is no doubt that desire will be aroused, especially if the husband kisses his wife, touches her, hands her food, or does something similar. In this, there is a fitnah (trial, discord or temptation) that necessitates that a person rule it as tahrim (prohibition). What we see is that this is something to be avoided and left alone, and that people should stick to their old customs which involve complete covering, modesty, and distance from the signs of fitnah (trial, discord or temptation).
The questioner : Yes.
The Shaykh : This is the answer, and this is the reasoning.
The questioner : Yes.