Encouraging the Choice of Noble Friends
Machine translationRead the Arabic original
Question:
The listener (A.A.M.) from the southern region asks and says: My problem is in my relationships with people. There are some whom I feel comfortable with, whom I sit with, and in whom I find a friend and companion, and I feel at ease in their presence. These are few. There is another group among those I know whom I cannot bear to sit with or talk to, and I am never comfortable with them. I find that my nature does not match theirs. Sometimes I am forced to stay with them, talk to them, and deal with them because of a kinship tie, work, or something else that compels me to be polite with them.
The Shaykh: Repeat, repeat.
The presenter: He says: My problem is in my relationships with people. There are some whom I feel comfortable with, whom I sit with, and in whom I find a friend and companion, and I feel at ease in their presence. These are few. There is another group among those I know whom I cannot bear to sit with or talk to, and I am never comfortable with them. I find that my nature does not match theirs. Sometimes I am forced to stay with them, talk to them, and deal with them because of a kinship tie, work, or something else, which compels me to be polite with them and to show cheerfulness and comfort against my will. While I am with them, I feel that I need to be artificial in my speech and treatment, and I am not good at this, which increases my aversion and distance from them and my lack of comfort toward them. Therefore, I have come to prefer avoiding everyone I am not comfortable with as much as possible, and this leads to some degree of isolation. I note that in a state of isolation and when I am alone, I feel at ease and benefit from my time by reciting the Qur'an and reading beneficial books.
Answer:
You must do what is best for your heart and choose good friends and companions. As for those you are repelled by, whose natures do not suit you, and with whom you do not feel at ease sitting, stay away from them. Choose for yourself what is best, even if it means sitting in your home to recite the Qur'an, glorify Allah, and do similar things. The believer accounts for himself and strives to control his soul by keeping the company of the righteous and staying away from the wicked, and by choosing the noble time and the noble companion. You strive to control your soul in what you see as best for your religion and safest for your religion. So, keep the company of the righteous, conceal their faults so that you may benefit from them, and stay away from the wicked, even if they are relatives, so that sitting with them does not harm you. Do not burden yourself with what you cannot bear.
However, if you do not desire to sit with the righteous, then this is a disease in your heart, if they are good people of religion. Strive to control your soul so that you stay with them and benefit from them. Even if your soul is repelled by them because of the disease of disobedience in it, do not pay attention to that. You must keep the company of the righteous, be patient with them, and benefit from them, even if you feel some stiffness or difficulty. Because the company of the righteous brings nothing but good, whereas the company of the wicked is a means to great evil.
So, the conclusion is that you judge by the pure Shari'ah what is best for your heart and most beneficial for your religion, regarding companions and non-companions. Sit with the good, the righteous, and those whose company benefits you, and stay away from those whose company harms you, whether they are relatives or others. Your home is better for you than sitting with those who harm you, and with whom you cannot bear to stay because of their bad actions, bad morals, or bad behavior. We ask Allah for success for everyone.
The presenter: O Allah, amen. May Allah reward you with good.
The listener (A.A.M.) from the southern region asks and says: My problem is in my relationships with people. There are some whom I feel comfortable with, whom I sit with, and in whom I find a friend and companion, and I feel at ease in their presence. These are few. There is another group among those I know whom I cannot bear to sit with or talk to, and I am never comfortable with them. I find that my nature does not match theirs. Sometimes I am forced to stay with them, talk to them, and deal with them because of a kinship tie, work, or something else that compels me to be polite with them.
The Shaykh: Repeat, repeat.
The presenter: He says: My problem is in my relationships with people. There are some whom I feel comfortable with, whom I sit with, and in whom I find a friend and companion, and I feel at ease in their presence. These are few. There is another group among those I know whom I cannot bear to sit with or talk to, and I am never comfortable with them. I find that my nature does not match theirs. Sometimes I am forced to stay with them, talk to them, and deal with them because of a kinship tie, work, or something else, which compels me to be polite with them and to show cheerfulness and comfort against my will. While I am with them, I feel that I need to be artificial in my speech and treatment, and I am not good at this, which increases my aversion and distance from them and my lack of comfort toward them. Therefore, I have come to prefer avoiding everyone I am not comfortable with as much as possible, and this leads to some degree of isolation. I note that in a state of isolation and when I am alone, I feel at ease and benefit from my time by reciting the Qur'an and reading beneficial books.
Answer:
You must do what is best for your heart and choose good friends and companions. As for those you are repelled by, whose natures do not suit you, and with whom you do not feel at ease sitting, stay away from them. Choose for yourself what is best, even if it means sitting in your home to recite the Qur'an, glorify Allah, and do similar things. The believer accounts for himself and strives to control his soul by keeping the company of the righteous and staying away from the wicked, and by choosing the noble time and the noble companion. You strive to control your soul in what you see as best for your religion and safest for your religion. So, keep the company of the righteous, conceal their faults so that you may benefit from them, and stay away from the wicked, even if they are relatives, so that sitting with them does not harm you. Do not burden yourself with what you cannot bear.
However, if you do not desire to sit with the righteous, then this is a disease in your heart, if they are good people of religion. Strive to control your soul so that you stay with them and benefit from them. Even if your soul is repelled by them because of the disease of disobedience in it, do not pay attention to that. You must keep the company of the righteous, be patient with them, and benefit from them, even if you feel some stiffness or difficulty. Because the company of the righteous brings nothing but good, whereas the company of the wicked is a means to great evil.
So, the conclusion is that you judge by the pure Shari'ah what is best for your heart and most beneficial for your religion, regarding companions and non-companions. Sit with the good, the righteous, and those whose company benefits you, and stay away from those whose company harms you, whether they are relatives or others. Your home is better for you than sitting with those who harm you, and with whom you cannot bear to stay because of their bad actions, bad morals, or bad behavior. We ask Allah for success for everyone.
The presenter: O Allah, amen. May Allah reward you with good.
Source
binbaz.org.sa
The Arabic text is copied verbatim from the original source, without any edits.