Ruling on Postponing the Needs of One's Parents to Attend Religious Knowledge

Question:
The Shaykh (may Allah preserve him): Peace be upon you and Allah's mercy and blessings. There are some righteous young men who disobey their parents and refuse their requests on the grounds that they have a lesson or a lecture they wish to attend. What is the ruling on their action? Is it correct, or is it considered undutifulness to the parents? We ask for advice for these people.


Answer:
Undutifulness to parents is a wrong that is not permissible. Undutifulness to them includes severing ties with them, mistreating them, causing them harm, insulting them, or failing to provide for them when they are in need. All of this is undutifulness. If his parents have a need, he must prioritize it and place it before going to attend a lecture or a lesson. This is a partial matter that does not prevent him from seeking knowledge or from keeping the company of the righteous; rather, it is incidental. In this case, he should prioritize obeying his parent, because dutifulness to them is obligatory. It is obligatory for him to prioritize their obedience in these partial matters and to place that before attending a specific lecture, a specific gathering, a specific symposium, or the like. Because dutifulness is obligatory, it is not to be abandoned for a recommended practice.
Furthermore, it is obligatory for children to strive with utmost effort to be dutiful to their parents, even if they are disbelievers. How much more so if they are Muslims? Allah says regarding disbelieving parents: [Luqman: 15]. They are disbelievers, so how much more so regarding Muslims? It is obligatory to be dutiful to them, to do good to them, to be gentle with them, to lower the wing of humility to them, to soften one's speech with them, and to listen to and obey them in what is right. This is the obligation of the child, whether male or female, young or old.