My Wife Hates My Father
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Fatwa No. ( 12193 )
Q: I have a wife who lives in a legitimate home, but unfortunately, O honorable Shaykh, she hates my father and mother with intense hatred, and she does not want them to enter my house. She currently has four children. Since she does not attend to the household affairs when they arrive, I personally prepare food for them, meaning I buy food for them from restaurants, make coffee for them, and arrange their bedding. They are unaware of this situation. When they ask about her, I tell them, without them realizing it, that I am in a dispute with the wife; I do not want, O honorable Shaykh, to let them know that she hates them. I hope for your guidance from Allah and then from your excellence, for by the great Allah, I am confused between my father, this wife, and the children, as they are living exhausted between me
and their mother, and since I do not want anything to hurt the wife's feelings, and I do not want anything other than guiding her with a fatwa from you, so that I can hand it to one of her brothers to read it to her, as she does not know how to read or write. Peace be upon you.
A: It is obligatory for each of the spouses to fear Allah (Mighty and Majestic), and to fulfill what is obligatory upon them toward the other, and for each to treat the other with kindness and excellence, and for each spouse to honor the relatives of their spouse, so that they may have good companionship and the family may be united. Allah the Exalted said: And He (Mighty and Majestic) said: [An-Nisa 4:34] And His saying: "submissive" — Ibn Abbas and others said: (those who obey their husbands). And His saying at the beginning of the verse: [An-Nisa 4:34] Ibn Kathir (may Allah have mercy on him) mentioned from Ibn Abbas (may Allah be pleased with them both) that he said: it means rulers over them, meaning: she obeys him in what Allah has commanded her to obey him in, and part of her obedience
is that she is kind to his family and guards his wealth. And success is from Allah, and may Allah send prayers and blessings upon our Prophet Muhammad, his family, and his Companions.
Q: I have a wife who lives in a legitimate home, but unfortunately, O honorable Shaykh, she hates my father and mother with intense hatred, and she does not want them to enter my house. She currently has four children. Since she does not attend to the household affairs when they arrive, I personally prepare food for them, meaning I buy food for them from restaurants, make coffee for them, and arrange their bedding. They are unaware of this situation. When they ask about her, I tell them, without them realizing it, that I am in a dispute with the wife; I do not want, O honorable Shaykh, to let them know that she hates them. I hope for your guidance from Allah and then from your excellence, for by the great Allah, I am confused between my father, this wife, and the children, as they are living exhausted between me
and their mother, and since I do not want anything to hurt the wife's feelings, and I do not want anything other than guiding her with a fatwa from you, so that I can hand it to one of her brothers to read it to her, as she does not know how to read or write. Peace be upon you.
A: It is obligatory for each of the spouses to fear Allah (Mighty and Majestic), and to fulfill what is obligatory upon them toward the other, and for each to treat the other with kindness and excellence, and for each spouse to honor the relatives of their spouse, so that they may have good companionship and the family may be united. Allah the Exalted said:
And live with them in kindness
وَعَاشِرُوهُنَّ بِالْمَعْرُوفِMen are in charge of women by [right of] what Allah has given one over the other and what they spend [for maintenance] from their wealth. So righteous women are devoutly obedient, guarding in [the husband's] absence what Allah would have them guard
الرِّجَالُ قَوَّامُونَ عَلَى النِّسَاءِ بِمَا فَضَّلَ اللَّهُ بَعْضَهُمْ عَلَى بَعْضٍ وَبِمَا أَنْفَقُوا مِنْ أَمْوَالِهِمْ فَالصَّالِحَاتُ قَانِتَاتٌ حَافِظَاتٌ لِلْغَيْبِ بِمَا حَفِظَ اللَّهُMen are in charge of women
الرِّجَالُ قَوَّامُونَ عَلَى النِّسَاءِis that she is kind to his family and guards his wealth. And success is from Allah, and may Allah send prayers and blessings upon our Prophet Muhammad, his family, and his Companions.
Source
www.alifta.gov.sa
The Arabic text is copied verbatim from the original source, without any edits.