Chapter "The Two Who Abuse Each Other: What They Say Falls on the First One" — Explanation of the Hadith of Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him)

The Shaykh : The author (may Allah have mercy on him) said: "Chapter: The Two Who Abuse Each Other: What They Say Falls on the First One":
He narrated beneath it with his authentic chain: from Abu Hurayrah from the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), who said: :
This hadith clarifies that if a man begins by abusing his Muslim brother, and the Muslim responds with a similar abuse, then the consequences of both abuses—the first one initiated by the first man and the second one which was the other's response to the first—fall on the initiator. This is because he established a bad precedent. However, this doubled sin belongs to the first one who initiated the abuse and the second one who responded. So this second person does not bear a sin; rather, it is an abuse, which is a disgrace and a blame. Its sin is recorded against the initiator in addition to his own specific sin. But this is not absolute; the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) qualified it by saying: :
If the wronged one increases in the abuse—for example, if one says to the other, "You are a donkey," and the other responds in kind, "You are a donkey"—then there are two sins: the sin of the initiator and the sin of the responder. Both sins fall on the initiator. But if the one who was wronged says, instead of "You are a donkey," "You are two donkeys," for example, this is called transgression. This is a method and style from the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) teaching the Muslim how he can retaliate against one who has wronged him and abuse one who has abused him without any sin being recorded against him. He does this by returning the abuse with the abuse and not increasing it. In this manner, he is saved from sin, and as the common people say here: "He is just like his nature", because a person is not a deaf stone; he has feelings and emotions. So if he is abused, it is permissible for him to respond to the abuse with its like and not increase it.
Therefore, for the one who is wronged, this is explicit in the Qur'an: This equivalence—the first one's transgression and the second one's response to the transgression with its like—two sins are recorded against the initiator because he was the cause. If the wronged one does not increase in the response with its like, he becomes his partner in the sin because he engaged with him. This is the meaning of the hadith: : meaning, the two who abuse each other, whatever they say of abuse and insults and the like, falls on the initiator. All of that, its sin and its evil, returns to the initiator, on the condition: : if he does not increase in the response with its like, then everything that comes from him and from the one who was wronged is recorded against the aggressor. But if he increases, he has shared in the sin.
This is an etiquette from the etiquettes of the Prophetic Sunnah. The Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) teaches us how we respond to people with their like if they transgress against us. There is no objection to responding in kind, even though: "And if you pardon and forgive, it is better for you" is also a general, well-known principle. However, this has its place and is not applied to just any person. That is, pardon and forgiveness are better, but with a person in whom it is hoped that pardon and forgiveness will have an effect, not one who will exploit it and consider it a weakness of the one who pardoned and forgave. In this case, he should be responded to with his like so that the forgiveness is not exploited as a weakness or as what he claims to be a weakness.
The hadith that follows is the same hadith as the one before it, except that its narrator from the Companions is different: the first one was narrated by him with his chain from Abu Hurayrah from the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) with the previous wording.