A woman marrying herself
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The marriage contract was not annulled
Question: One of the members of our village traveled, and his absence in travel was prolonged,He wrote a letter to the head of our village saying: He told my wife that if she wanted a divorce at her request (khul'), she should do so, but the head of the village did not inform anyone of this message. After forty-five months had passed, that man returned to his family and his home. Does anything fall upon him because of what he wrote, or not?
Answer: If the situation is as you described, that the head of the village did not convey to the woman the choice given to her by her husband, if she wanted to annul the marriage, and she did not know about it, and no annulment took place on her part, then she remains under the marriage contract, and he is her husband, because nothing occurred that would lift the marriage contract. And Allah knows best.
[A woman marrying herself]
Question: A pious young man with good character proposed to me, but my father refused to accept it on the grounds of his lack of status and lineage. He wants for me a young man from the established families who have wealth and status, while I am content with him and do not want anyone else. Is it permissible for me to marry him without my guardian? I have read in *Fiqh al-Sunnah* by Abu Hanifah that such a marriage is permissible. Also, Allah has entrusted the affairs of the servant to himself, including marriage. If my father is going to deprive me of marrying someone suitable for me, who is careful about my honor and the protection of my chastity and is committed to his religion, and then wants to marry me to someone who does not possess these qualities, do I not have the right to not seek his permission to marry a righteous person, and to marry myself before the judge, or to seek the permission of one of my other relatives who agrees with my viewpoint and takes charge of my marriage?
Answer: First: It is not permissible for a woman to marry herself. If she marries herself, her marriage is invalid according to the majority of scholars, both the Salaf and the Khalaf. This is because Allah, Glorified and Exalted is He, addressed the guardians of women regarding marriage, saying: [Surat al-Nur: 32] ,And he (peace and blessings be upon him) said: Jami` at-Tirmidhi 1084Da'if (Darussalam) ،And he (peace and blessings be upon him) said: Sunan al-Bayhaqi 10:1088 .
As for what you mentioned that she read in some books of jurisprudence that a woman may marry
herself, this is a weak and weaker position, and the correct position, which is supported by evidence, is the opposite. It is not permissible to act upon it.
As for what you mentioned about her situation, and that she has an opinion that differs from her father's opinion because her father wants for her a husband of high status and lineage who is her equal, while she does not see it that way, but rather leans toward marrying a person she sees as having religion, even if he does not have status and lineage, the truth is with her father in this matter. Her father has a broader perspective than she does, and it may seem to her that this person is suitable for her when in fact he is not. So she must not contradict her father as long as he is looking out for her benefit. If it is established that this person is suitable for her and is her equal in status, lineage, and religion, and if this is the case and her father refuses to marry her to him, then he is considered to be withholding her (mu'adhdil) at that time, and the guardianship transfers to the next of the remaining guardians. However, this requires referring to the judge to transfer the guardianship from the withholding father to the next of the remaining guardians. She herself cannot act, nor can any of her guardians act without her father's consent. It is necessary to return to the Shari'ah judge, who will look into the subject and the circumstances of the case. If he sees that the guardianship should be transferred to another, he will transfer it according to what is in the best interest. Matters in marriage must be regulated, and it is necessary to take care of women, because women's perspective is limited, and their male guardians have a concern for their protection and jealousy for them that women do not have. This should be taken into consideration. And Allah knows best.
Question: One of the members of our village traveled, and his absence in travel was prolonged,He wrote a letter to the head of our village saying: He told my wife that if she wanted a divorce at her request (khul'), she should do so, but the head of the village did not inform anyone of this message. After forty-five months had passed, that man returned to his family and his home. Does anything fall upon him because of what he wrote, or not?
Answer: If the situation is as you described, that the head of the village did not convey to the woman the choice given to her by her husband, if she wanted to annul the marriage, and she did not know about it, and no annulment took place on her part, then she remains under the marriage contract, and he is her husband, because nothing occurred that would lift the marriage contract. And Allah knows best.
[A woman marrying herself]
Question: A pious young man with good character proposed to me, but my father refused to accept it on the grounds of his lack of status and lineage. He wants for me a young man from the established families who have wealth and status, while I am content with him and do not want anyone else. Is it permissible for me to marry him without my guardian? I have read in *Fiqh al-Sunnah* by Abu Hanifah that such a marriage is permissible. Also, Allah has entrusted the affairs of the servant to himself, including marriage. If my father is going to deprive me of marrying someone suitable for me, who is careful about my honor and the protection of my chastity and is committed to his religion, and then wants to marry me to someone who does not possess these qualities, do I not have the right to not seek his permission to marry a righteous person, and to marry myself before the judge, or to seek the permission of one of my other relatives who agrees with my viewpoint and takes charge of my marriage?
Answer: First: It is not permissible for a woman to marry herself. If she marries herself, her marriage is invalid according to the majority of scholars, both the Salaf and the Khalaf. This is because Allah, Glorified and Exalted is He, addressed the guardians of women regarding marriage, saying:
And marry the unmarried among you and the righteous among your male slaves
وَأَنْكِحُوا الْأَيَامَى مِنْكُمْ وَالصَّالِحِينَ مِنْ عِبَادِكُمْWhen someone whose religion and character you are pleased with proposes to (someone under the care) of one of you, then marry to him.
إذا أتاكم من ترضون دينه وخلقه فزوجوهThere is no marriage except with a guardian and two just witnesses.
لا نكاح إلا بولي وشاهدي عدلAs for what you mentioned that she read in some books of jurisprudence that a woman may marry
herself, this is a weak and weaker position, and the correct position, which is supported by evidence, is the opposite. It is not permissible to act upon it.
As for what you mentioned about her situation, and that she has an opinion that differs from her father's opinion because her father wants for her a husband of high status and lineage who is her equal, while she does not see it that way, but rather leans toward marrying a person she sees as having religion, even if he does not have status and lineage, the truth is with her father in this matter. Her father has a broader perspective than she does, and it may seem to her that this person is suitable for her when in fact he is not. So she must not contradict her father as long as he is looking out for her benefit. If it is established that this person is suitable for her and is her equal in status, lineage, and religion, and if this is the case and her father refuses to marry her to him, then he is considered to be withholding her (mu'adhdil) at that time, and the guardianship transfers to the next of the remaining guardians. However, this requires referring to the judge to transfer the guardianship from the withholding father to the next of the remaining guardians. She herself cannot act, nor can any of her guardians act without her father's consent. It is necessary to return to the Shari'ah judge, who will look into the subject and the circumstances of the case. If he sees that the guardianship should be transferred to another, he will transfer it according to what is in the best interest. Matters in marriage must be regulated, and it is necessary to take care of women, because women's perspective is limited, and their male guardians have a concern for their protection and jealousy for them that women do not have. This should be taken into consideration. And Allah knows best.