I have a mother who, whenever she asks me for something for the house, I do it quickly, and I do not show annoyance in front of her, nor do I display any irritation to her, but when I go to some of my sisters in
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The questioner : The questioner says: I have a mother (may Allah preserve her) who, whenever she asks me for something for the house, I do it quickly, and I do not show annoyance in front of her, nor do I display any irritation to her. But when I go to some of my sisters in Allah, I complain to them about my mother, saying that what my mother asks for is too much. Is this considered undutifulness to parents? Please advise us, may Allah reward you.
The Shaykh : I see that this is undutifulness to parents, because it is backbiting about the mother. If this woman is pleasing her mother by doing what she asks, seeking the Face of Allah, then it is not permissible for her to boast about it or to harm her mother by speaking ill of her to her friends. Allah the Exalted said:[Al-Baqarah 2:264] So this woman should repent to Allah (Mighty and Majestic) for what she has done, and she should stop doing it in the future, and she should hope, by pleasing her mother with what she asks, for the Face of Allah (Mighty and Majestic), and she should ask for guidance for her.
The questioner : May Allah reward you with good.
The Shaykh : I see that this is undutifulness to parents, because it is backbiting about the mother. If this woman is pleasing her mother by doing what she asks, seeking the Face of Allah, then it is not permissible for her to boast about it or to harm her mother by speaking ill of her to her friends. Allah the Exalted said:
O you who have believed, do not invalidate your charities with reminders or injury
يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا لا تُبْطِلُوا صَدَقَاتِكُمْ بِالْمَنِّ وَالأَذَىThe questioner : May Allah reward you with good.