Many wives do not want their husbands to marry other women; what is your advice to them?
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The questioner : Many wives, may Allah guide them, do not want their husbands to marry other women. I am asking for advice for them from the radio program "Light on the Path." May Allah reward you with good.
The Shaykh : Yes, the advice in this matter is that we first say to the husbands: It is not permissible for a man to marry more than one woman unless he has the capacity in wealth, the capacity in physical strength, and the capacity in justice. If he does not have the capacity in wealth, the second marriage may become a cause for his debts to increase and for people to press him for payment. If he does not have the capacity in physical strength, he may not fulfill the rights of the second wife or of both wives. And if he does not have the capacity for justice, Allah the Exalted said:[An-Nisa 4:3].
If a man has the capacity in wealth, physical strength, and justice, then the best for him is to marry more than one woman, because of the many benefits that result from this:
Such as protecting the chastity of the second woman, increasing the offspring, which the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) loved, and removing from the heart of a man the desire to marry another.
As for the previous wife, my advice to her is: Do not stand between the man and what Allah has prescribed for him. Rather, she should, if she sees in her husband the desire for this and that he is capable in his wealth, his body, and in justice, be encouraging of him to do so, because of the benefits we have mentioned. She should know that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) had multiple wives. She should also know that there may be good for her in this; the second woman may help her with her affairs and fulfill some of the rights of her husband in which the first wife may sometimes fall short.
And the important thing is that my advice to women is: Do not be overcome by great jealousy when the husband marries another. Rather, they should be patient and seek reward from Allah, even if it is difficult. This difficulty or emotional strain occurs at the beginning of the marriage, and after that, the matter becomes natural.
The questioner : May Allah reward you.
The Shaykh : Yes, the advice in this matter is that we first say to the husbands: It is not permissible for a man to marry more than one woman unless he has the capacity in wealth, the capacity in physical strength, and the capacity in justice. If he does not have the capacity in wealth, the second marriage may become a cause for his debts to increase and for people to press him for payment. If he does not have the capacity in physical strength, he may not fulfill the rights of the second wife or of both wives. And if he does not have the capacity for justice, Allah the Exalted said:
But if you fear that you will not be just, then [marry only] one
فَإِنْ خِفْتُمْ أَلَّا تَعْدِلُوا فَوَاحِدَةًIf a man has the capacity in wealth, physical strength, and justice, then the best for him is to marry more than one woman, because of the many benefits that result from this:
Such as protecting the chastity of the second woman, increasing the offspring, which the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) loved, and removing from the heart of a man the desire to marry another.
As for the previous wife, my advice to her is: Do not stand between the man and what Allah has prescribed for him. Rather, she should, if she sees in her husband the desire for this and that he is capable in his wealth, his body, and in justice, be encouraging of him to do so, because of the benefits we have mentioned. She should know that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) had multiple wives. She should also know that there may be good for her in this; the second woman may help her with her affairs and fulfill some of the rights of her husband in which the first wife may sometimes fall short.
And the important thing is that my advice to women is: Do not be overcome by great jealousy when the husband marries another. Rather, they should be patient and seek reward from Allah, even if it is difficult. This difficulty or emotional strain occurs at the beginning of the marriage, and after that, the matter becomes natural.
The questioner : May Allah reward you.