A young man says he is seventeen years old and has paternal cousins who are the same age as his mother, and they have refused to wear the hijab in front of him on the grounds that they used to play with him when he was young
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The questioner : I am a young man who has reached the age of seventeen, and I have paternal cousins who are the same age as my mother. They have refused to wear the hijab in front of me on the grounds that they used to play with me when I was young, so I am like one of their sons and they cannot cover themselves from me. What should I do, may Allah preserve you?
The Shaykh : Before answering his question, I offer advice to his paternal cousins to fear Allah (Mighty and Majestic) and to cover themselves from this man, for he is like a stranger to them. Just as it is not permissible for them to uncover their faces before a stranger, it is not permissible for them to uncover their faces before this paternal cousin, even if they raised him in his youth and were like mothers to him. The criterion is what the Shari'ah has brought, not what people have become accustomed to, and the criterion is guidance, not desire. This is one point.
As for him, he must lower his gaze and not sit with them, because in this state they are disobedient. It is not permissible to sit with a disobedient person except for the sake of advising them. If these women do not heed the advice, do not respect it, or pay any attention to it, then it is not permissible for him to be in their presence while they are uncovering their faces. However, if it is assumed that they are in a house where he resides and he must remain in that house, he must lower his gaze as much as he is able.
The questioner : May Allah reward you with good.
The Shaykh : Before answering his question, I offer advice to his paternal cousins to fear Allah (Mighty and Majestic) and to cover themselves from this man, for he is like a stranger to them. Just as it is not permissible for them to uncover their faces before a stranger, it is not permissible for them to uncover their faces before this paternal cousin, even if they raised him in his youth and were like mothers to him. The criterion is what the Shari'ah has brought, not what people have become accustomed to, and the criterion is guidance, not desire. This is one point.
As for him, he must lower his gaze and not sit with them, because in this state they are disobedient. It is not permissible to sit with a disobedient person except for the sake of advising them. If these women do not heed the advice, do not respect it, or pay any attention to it, then it is not permissible for him to be in their presence while they are uncovering their faces. However, if it is assumed that they are in a house where he resides and he must remain in that house, he must lower his gaze as much as he is able.
The questioner : May Allah reward you with good.