Dutifulness to Parents During Their Lifetimes and After Their Deaths

Question:
I hope you will clarify dutifulness to parents during their lifetimes and after their deaths?

Answer:
Dutifulness to parents is among the most important obligations and duties. Allah commanded this in His Noble Book in many verses, including His saying, the Exalted: [Al-Nisa: 36], and His saying (peace and blessings be upon him) in Surat al-Saba: and lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy, and say: “My Lord, have mercy upon them as they brought me up when I was small” [Al-Isra: 23-24], and His saying, the Exalted, in Surat Luqman: [Luqman: 14]. Thus, being dutiful to them is among the most important duties, whether they are alive or dead.
So their dutifulness in life is: being kind to them, spending on them if they are in need, listening to and obeying them in what is good, lowering the wing to them, not raising one’s voice at them, defending them in everything that harms them, and other forms of good.
The summary is that the child should be eager to bring good to them and ward off evil from them in life and in death; because they have done great kindness to him in his youth, raising him, honoring him, and toiling for him. So it is obligatory for him to reciprocate kindness with kindness and goodness with goodness. The mother’s right is greater, as the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said when he was asked: “O Messenger of Allah, who is the most deserving of my good companionship?” He said: . He said: “Then who?” He said: . He said: “Then who?” He said: . He said: “Then who?” He said: .
In another wording: He said, “O Messenger of Allah, who is the most deserving of my dutifulness?” (He said, “Who should I be dutiful to, O Messenger of Allah?”) He said: . He said: “Then who?” He said: . He said: “Then who?” He said: . He said: “Then who?” He said: .
And he, peace and blessings be upon him, clarified that the most deserving of kindness and dutifulness is your mother, three times, then your father in the fourth. This obligates the child to care for the mother more, and to be more complete in kindness to her, then the father follows her after that. So their dutifulness and kindness to both of them is an obligatory matter, and the mother’s right over the child, whether male or female, is greater and larger.
The Messenger, peace and blessings be upon him, was asked about the right of parents after their deaths? So a questioner said to him: “O Messenger of Allah, is there any dutifulness to my parents remaining that I can do for them after their passing?” He said: .
Five things: : Supplication, and among that is the funeral prayer, for it is supplication, and praying for them: seeking mercy for them is the most rightful right and among the greatest dutifulness in life and death.
And asking Allah to forgive their bad deeds, this is the greatest dutifulness to them, whether alive or dead.
which they bequeath, so it is obligatory for the child, whether male or female, to carry it out if it is in accordance with the pure Shari'ah.
And the fourth trait: If your father or mother has friends, loved ones, and relatives, be kind to them, and value for them the companionship and friendship of your parents, and do not forget that with kind words and kindness if they are in need of kindness, and all types of good that you are able to do, so this is their dutifulness after their passing.
And the fifth trait: And that is by being kind to your paternal uncles and your father’s relatives, and to your maternal uncles and aunts from your mother’s relatives. This is part of kindness to the parents, and dutifulness to parents is that you be kind to your parents’ relatives: the paternal uncles, aunts, and their children, and the maternal uncles, aunts, and their children. Being kind to them and maintaining ties with them, all of that is from maintaining the ties of the parents and from honoring the parents.