Living with one another in a good manner
Machine translationRead the Arabic original
And among what relates to marriage, and it is very important: It is obligatory for each of the spouses to treat the other in a good manner,By the saying of Allah (Blessed and Exalted is He): [Surat al-Nisa: 19] It is obligatory for the wife to treat her husband in a good manner and to fulfill his rights to the best of her ability, and it is obligatory for the husband likewise to treat his wife in a good manner and to fear Allah regarding her, as the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) advised in the Farewell Pilgrimage, in the greatest Islamic gathering, when he said: “Fear Allah regarding women, for you have taken them in trust from Allah and made their private parts lawful by the word of Allah” So he advised regarding people,And he said: “Advise well regarding women, for they were created from a rib” ,And he said, may the prayers and peace of Allah be upon him: “Fear Allah regarding women, for they are in a state of weakness with you” and the weak ones: plural of the weak one, and the weak one is the captive, meaning: in the position of a captive.
So it is obligatory for each of the spouses to fulfill what Allah has made obligatory of good treatment, and the husband must not dominate the wife because he is higher than her and because her affairs are in his hand. Likewise, it is not permissible for the wife to be arrogant toward the husband, but each of them should treat the other with kindness.
It is known that a husband may develop dislike for his wife, either due to her shortcoming in his rights, or due to a deficiency in her intellect or intelligence, or the like. So how should he treat this woman?We say: This is found in the Qur'an and the Sunnah,Allah, Blessed and Exalted, said: [Surat al-Nisa: 19] And this is the reality; a person may dislike his wife for a reason, then he is patient, and Allah the Mighty and Majestic places much good in this, the dislike turns into love, and the weariness into comfort, and so on,And the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “A believer does not dislike a believing woman” meaning: he does not hate her or dislike her, “if he dislikes a trait in her, he is pleased with another trait” Look at the contrast; the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) was given wisdom by Allah, “if he dislikes a trait in her, he is pleased with another trait” Does anyone get what he desires in this world? No, absolutely not, you do not get what you desire in this world, and if it is fulfilled in one thing, it is lacking in another,Even on days, Allah the Mighty and Majestic says: [Surat Ali 'Imran: 140] And regarding this, the pre-Islamic poet said:
A day is upon us and a day is for us, a day we are grieved and a day we are pleased
And try this and you will find, the world does not remain in one state,And among the common proverbs: “The permanence of a state is impossible” .
So if you dislike something in your husband, counter it with what pleases you until you are convinced,And it is also said to the woman: This is the man who has been decreed for you, so be patient and seek reward, and Allah will make for you a relief and an exit, if patience becomes impossible, then we try to reconcile as Allah the Exalted said: [Surat al-Nisa: 35] This is if the discord is between both parties.
And live with them in a manner that is good.
وَعَاشِرُوهُنَّ بِالْمَعْرُوفِSo it is obligatory for each of the spouses to fulfill what Allah has made obligatory of good treatment, and the husband must not dominate the wife because he is higher than her and because her affairs are in his hand. Likewise, it is not permissible for the wife to be arrogant toward the husband, but each of them should treat the other with kindness.
It is known that a husband may develop dislike for his wife, either due to her shortcoming in his rights, or due to a deficiency in her intellect or intelligence, or the like. So how should he treat this woman?We say: This is found in the Qur'an and the Sunnah,Allah, Blessed and Exalted, said:
For if you dislike them - perhaps you dislike a thing and Allah makes therein much good.
فَإِنْ كَرِهْتُمُوهُنَّ فَعَسَى أَنْ تَكْرَهُوا شَيْئاً وَيَجْعَلَ اللَّهُ فِيهِ خَيْراً كَثِيراًAnd these days [of varying conditions] We alternate among the people
وَتِلْكَ الْأَيَّامُ نُدَاوِلُهَا بَيْنَ النَّاسِA day is upon us and a day is for us, a day we are grieved and a day we are pleased
And try this and you will find, the world does not remain in one state,And among the common proverbs: “The permanence of a state is impossible” .
So if you dislike something in your husband, counter it with what pleases you until you are convinced,And it is also said to the woman: This is the man who has been decreed for you, so be patient and seek reward, and Allah will make for you a relief and an exit, if patience becomes impossible, then we try to reconcile as Allah the Exalted said: