How to Treat One Another with Kindness Between Husband and Wife

Question:
Your Eminence! How is a righteous marital life between husband and wife to be? And I ask: regarding the reality of people’s laxity in the matter of divorce and their negligence in it, Your Eminence, perhaps you have some guidance?

Answer:
There is no doubt that it is obligatory for both spouses to treat one another with kindness; for Allah (Exalted and Majestic is He) said: [Surat al-Nisa: 19]. So it is obligatory for the husband to treat her with kindness, and for the wife likewise; it is obligatory for each of them to treat the other with kindness. The husband strives to treat her with kindness, and she likewise [Surat al-Baqarah: 228]. So he strives, and she strives with good speech, a good manner, guarding the tongue from what is not appropriate, and guarding the hand from what is not appropriate. So he treats her with kindness, and she likewise in all circumstances. And each of them is keen on good speech, a good manner, and fulfilling the obligation. The man provides what Allah has made obligatory upon him of financial maintenance, along with good speech and a good manner. And she likewise; it is upon her to submit herself to him, to listen and obey him in what is right, to address him in the best manner, and not to withhold from him his need which Allah has prescribed for him to fulfill. This is what is obligatory for them: that they all cooperate in goodness, and that each one be keen on good treatment, avoiding dispute, and avoiding injustice. With this, matters will be set right and circumstances will be straightened. But with injustice and bad treatment, circumstances will not be straightened. We ask Allah for safety. Yes.

The presenter: O Allah, amen. May Allah reward you with good, Your Eminence.