What are the rights of the husband over the wife?
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The questioner : ... .
The Shaykh : ... What the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) indicated in the Farewell Pilgrimage in his sermon on the Day of 'Arafah when he said:Musannaf Ibn Abi Shaybah 9:2091 It is not permissible for a woman to allow anyone to enter her husband's house while he dislikes his entry, even if it is her closest relative, because the house is his house and the right is his right. She must also obey him; she must obey him in what is his right. If he calls her to the bed, she must obey him, unless there is harm to her in doing so or she would miss an obligatory duty of Allah. If she does not do so, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) informed us that if a man calls his wife to his bed and she refuses to come, the angels curse her until morning.
As for the absolute rights that are left to custom, these differ according to customs. For example, is it obligatory for a woman to serve her husband in household matters such as cooking and washing? We say that this returns to custom. If it is the custom of people that the woman performs these tasks, she must perform them. If the custom is not that, and someone other than the wife performs them, then the wife is not required to perform them. The wives of the Companions (may Allah be pleased with them) used to perform such things, as Fatimah complained to the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) about the fatigue she found from the grinding stone, because she was grinding grain for the food of the house. And as the wife of al-Zubayr ibn al-'Awwam used to carry date pits from Madinah to his orchard outside Madinah. So, what the Lawgiver did not specify who among the two spouses should perform is according to custom, as Allah the Exalted said:.
And here with us in the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia, the woman performs such matters, meaning cooking and washing the house and the like. People still do it this way. However, if the custom changes and becomes established, and someone other than the wife performs these matters, then the ruling is according to what the custom requires. Yes.
The questioner : May Allah reward you. This is a message received from a listener whose code name is H M, from the Arab Republic of Egypt, Matrouh Governorate.
The Shaykh : ... What the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) indicated in the Farewell Pilgrimage in his sermon on the Day of 'Arafah when he said:
And you have a right over them that they do not allow anyone you dislike to sit on your beds
ولكم عليهن ألا يوطئن فرَشكم أحداً تكرهونهAs for the absolute rights that are left to custom, these differ according to customs. For example, is it obligatory for a woman to serve her husband in household matters such as cooking and washing? We say that this returns to custom. If it is the custom of people that the woman performs these tasks, she must perform them. If the custom is not that, and someone other than the wife performs them, then the wife is not required to perform them. The wives of the Companions (may Allah be pleased with them) used to perform such things, as Fatimah complained to the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) about the fatigue she found from the grinding stone, because she was grinding grain for the food of the house. And as the wife of al-Zubayr ibn al-'Awwam used to carry date pits from Madinah to his orchard outside Madinah. So, what the Lawgiver did not specify who among the two spouses should perform is according to custom, as Allah the Exalted said:
And live with them in kindness
وَعَاشِرُوهُنَّ بِالْمَعْرُوفِAnd here with us in the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia, the woman performs such matters, meaning cooking and washing the house and the like. People still do it this way. However, if the custom changes and becomes established, and someone other than the wife performs these matters, then the ruling is according to what the custom requires. Yes.
The questioner : May Allah reward you. This is a message received from a listener whose code name is H M, from the Arab Republic of Egypt, Matrouh Governorate.