I married my maternal aunt’s daughter, and it happened that they increased the bridal gift for me until I disliked the marriage because of the heavy costs imposed on me, where the costs of the marriage reached
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The questioner : I married my maternal aunt’s daughter, and it happened that they increased the bridal gift for me until I disliked the marriage because of the heavy costs imposed on me, where the costs of the marriage reached seventy-five thousand riyals. In a moment of distress and anger, I argued with my mother about this girl, which caused me to utter the word of divorce. I describe the situation to you: the mother said, “Do you not want her as your wife?”
So I said to her, “I will divorce her,” and that was without her presence. I know that I did not desire this girl, and I did not marry out of my own desire, but based on my mother’s desire and her insistence on me, because she is her sister’s daughter and she would show her compassion and kindness. Now I have a small daughter from this girl, and I fear that I may have fallen into divorce, so please advise us, O Shaykh Muhammad? May Allah reward you with good?
The Shaykh : I say: May Allah bless you in your family and grant you both affection and harmony. Your saying to your mother, “I will divorce her,” is not considered a divorce, but rather a report of what will happen from you. So if you do not divorce her, there is no divorce. What I advise you is that as long as this woman is righteous in her religion and upright in her morals, you should be patient with her. For Allah the Exalted says:[An-Nisa 4:19] Especially since she has pleased the mother, and the mother desires that she remain with you, so keeping her is good from two aspects: from the aspect that patience with a woman is among the matters required by the Shari'ah, and from the aspect that this is part of dutifulness to your mother. I ask Allah the Exalted to bless you both in your marriage and to grant you both good offspring. Indeed, He is Capable of all things.
The questioner : May Allah reward you with good.
So I said to her, “I will divorce her,” and that was without her presence. I know that I did not desire this girl, and I did not marry out of my own desire, but based on my mother’s desire and her insistence on me, because she is her sister’s daughter and she would show her compassion and kindness. Now I have a small daughter from this girl, and I fear that I may have fallen into divorce, so please advise us, O Shaykh Muhammad? May Allah reward you with good?
The Shaykh : I say: May Allah bless you in your family and grant you both affection and harmony. Your saying to your mother, “I will divorce her,” is not considered a divorce, but rather a report of what will happen from you. So if you do not divorce her, there is no divorce. What I advise you is that as long as this woman is righteous in her religion and upright in her morals, you should be patient with her. For Allah the Exalted says:
For if you dislike them - perhaps you dislike a thing and Allah makes therein much good.
فَإِن كَرِهْتُمُوهُنَّ فَعَسَى أَن تَكْرَهُواْ شَيْئًا وَيَجْعَلَ اللّهُ فِيهِ خَيْرًا كَثِيرًاThe questioner : May Allah reward you with good.